It All Began With 935
by elementzeros
Summary: A series of one-shots that will soon follow with all your favorite Call Of Duty Zombie characters, ranging from the most hilarious and bizarre of situations to dark themes of anything CoD: Nazi Zombie. Rated T for language and suggestive themes. R&R
1. Christmas in Jul I Mean June!

**A/N:Hello! Thank you for giving a damn and tuning into my story to read ^^. Zombie lovers a-like; I am glad you are all reading and I would beg on hands and knees for some reviews.. but I'm not THAT pathetic... but anyways you might know me as a friendly reviewer by the names of 'NiteNdPurity' or annon. user TooLazyToLogIn...**

**Anyways back to the point, these are a series of random zombie slaying one shots. I'd like to stick to the regular zombie crew, but if any requests come upon the 'Five' crew or the 'Call of The Dead' crew I'll think on it. Anyways I won't bug you with random talking and please, If you like my style of writing and whatnot, and would like to see a different scenario of some kind with the characters please feel free to leave a review with ideas and I'll write it up! Also sorry for the over use of big words and overly describing things :p.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters or some other things that might be mentioned along these various one-shots in this story, they belong to the developers of Call of Duty: World at War and Call of Duty: Black Ops; Treyarch. I simply own small elements in where the inspiration comes from... at least I hope I do!**

**Enjoy!**

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><p><em>Christmas in Jul- I mean June!<em>

The four men finally managed to get a break from the zombies' hordes. The night had hindered to be colder than most. Tank managed to grab the scattered, lit, gasoline barrels that strangely have not managed to blow up yet and bring them over to a lone soviet space Lander near a peculiar purple perk-a-cola machine.

"Damn! Why is it so cold? Isn't it like...? Jul-"

"Nien Dempshey! According to ze several documents and zhe peculiar climate inRussiait is actually June!" gave a small chuckle to the very annoyed American solider as he tried not to lose his temper to the crazy doctor.

"One-month difference," he scoffed," Big deal! Anyways that's not the point! I'm freezing my nuts off here!"

Followed by a burp, a slightly overweight Russian man made his way up the stairs rather brashly as a small Japanese man gave a shove to the drunk and made his way to the other two men.

"Russian have no honor!" Takeo marched forward and made his way between Dempsey and Richtofen to join them at the small fire.

"Shut- up small mustached man! Nikolai drink vodka now!".

Now all four men were surrounded about the make-shift heat source, a awkward silence floated between the four. An abrupt cough ended it between them as the crazy German doctor arose and randomly pulled out a stick of some sort and tapped it on the barrels grabbing the others attention.

"Ok everyone gather around!" he gave a gleeful smile. Dempsey groaned. "Zhe doctor has a Christmas story for you!" Dr. Richtofen grasped his gloved hands taking a deep breath and was getting ready to speak.

Before said doctor could speak, Nikolai leaned forward from his seat on the floor and took a small swig from a vodka bottle, "O-oh story time! I love it!". The marine thought otherwise as he gave another annoyed groan as he shifted positions and rested his head in his palm, his deep voice rang slightly. "Oh joy... I'm warm and fuzzy already". The doctor tried his best to give Dempsey and annoyed stare, "Feel free to leave Dempshey... or kill yourself", the stares continued between the two. Something in the marines mind clicked as he smiled cockily to Edward, "Is that Mistletoe? Suddenly I feel like _kicking_ you on the mouth". He tried his hardest not to crack a smile as Richtofen began to look around a bit panicked hoping the Christmas plant really wasn't above them.

Chaos slowly started to arise as Nikolai began muttering, '_Vodka... Where's my vodka?'_. Ignored, Edward continued, " Zhis Christmas story zhat I have for you vas one my grandfather used to tell me vhen I vas a little, little liebchen!" (Small A/N here, sorry if that German word isn't the correct one... It's kind of hard to tell how exactly that word was spelled from trying to write this from words spoken in a video :p) In between a small laugh Nikolai spoke up trying to remember something else he remembered as a child. "Oh it's like grandpa used to talk 'bout hookers!"

All of them gave Nikolai a dead-panned look.

"Nien... It's nothing like zhat..", Slightly feeling a bit moronic the soviet, nonchalantly, took another small swig from his vodka bottle. Lightening up the situation, Takeo spoke up a bit, "I rank hookah!". The doctor eyed the Japanese man warily. Clearing his throat, "T'was zhe night before Christmas, and all through zhe house, not a creature was stirring... except for a mouse," As if on queue a small squeak followed by small patters of feet echoed on the metal flooring of their camping locations. Shortly it was ended by a loud bang from a gun, just a small squeak before Takeo took a honor-ful victory, "I kill de mouse!". A small acknowledgement was made from the doctor before he continued on giving the three other men a livid image of the story.

As the words left the Nazi's lips, the marine, the soviet, and the jap began to let their minds wrap around the story and imagine the situation themselves. Shotguns acted as stockings, and a lovely home, instead, decorated in blood and the floor littered with corpses of the deceased. At the mentioning of 'Zombie Clause' they all began to snicker and boast excitedly, especially Nikolai. It all began to play out as he then began to explain how they all were sleeping peacefully, of course with the exception of beautiful murder in their heads. An appraisal of hoots and hollers came from Dempsey and Takeo; apparently they're a bit TOO content with murder it may seem. The story continued as both Nikolai and Richtofen too, slept with their respected head gear, blissfully waiting for the jolly zombie. To add to the ambiance Nikolai began to snore obnoxiously gaining a raised blonde eyebrow and a small eye roll from another.

Snapping out of his acting role, the Russian nudged the Nazi with his elbow, grabbing his attention, Nikolai gave a wink, "I be big spoon, you be little spoon!" Richtofen smiled slightly before shushing the drunk and whispered, "Don't tell anyone!" "Okay!"

I think Dempsey was going to be sick.

Stepping over the top Richtofen began to get into more detail. "Vhen out on ze lawn, zhere arose such a clammer!" he then realistically reached back to retrieve an imaginary shot gun and 'pulled back ze hammer'. The crazed doctor then began to get even more into his Christmas tale and acted out a bit more. Running over to a window, "Away to ze window, I flew without haste! I opened the shutters and-" his voice rose and he yelled triumphantly, "BEGAN TO LAY WASTE!" He gave out a slightly demented laugh as the others laughed along to the spectacle. "Bonzai!" yelled Takeo. It just began to get a bit creepy once the doctor slightly forgot the actually purpose of the story as he began to get a bit into his necrophilia obsessions.

"And to what my vondering I should I see, a miniature sleigh..." the doctors face showed with discuss while managing to get out the end of the sentence, "with _flithy_ monkeys," A chorus of hate went between the group, "Uh.. I _hate_ monkeys," Nikolai grasped his bottle slightly angry as the rest began to agree with the Russian.

Of course his hatred went a bit deeper, the image of that damned cymbal monkey played in his mind with that awful and ugly smile on the stupid toys face.

The thought went away quickly as Edward continued with the hatred of the monkeys. "Monkey have no honor!". Once again, the men had themselves agreeing together that monkeys were no good. "As I pulled back ze trigger, all set for ze kill... down came the chimney came Zombie Clause! Ahaha!" gave a high-pitched laugh as the rest 'O-oh'd' and 'Aw'd'. "Ja, vhat a thrill!"

Going into detail Zombie Clause was a very... interesting fellow. Wearing the flesh from the actually Saint Nick with claws all bloodied, from the blood we all know came from. "Ah man... This is sick," Tank shook his head in distaste for the zombie all too quick. "A bundle of limbs... poked out from his sac," at this Edward's green eyes started to shine a little, "He looked like a hobo, just having a snack!" Getting up a bit for another swig of the alcohol Nikolai just felt to announce, "Just like brother! He is broke!" Dempsey gave an amused smirk to the man before getting his attention back to the doc. "His eyes vere glazed over, his nose vas not zhere! His cheeks were half eaten! But he had not a care!" Dempsey just seemed to look even sicker now as the sadistic doctor continued. A strange groan echoed around them. "Zhe drool from his mouth split onto the floor, and ze stench from his carcass!" The doctor moaned as his eyes rolled to the back of his head a bit as he tried to hold it back, but he loved seeing the others slightly uncomfortable at himself so he felt he just had to add this in for shits n' giggles. "I simply _adored_". The others tried their best not to give a strange look to the doctor. He had just sounded like he 'let himself go' a bit too much there. "Oh and did I mention he vore some intestines around his head like a reef?". The doc was _REALLY_ trying hard to contain himself there. It showed. "He had a distended belly zhat shook vhen he moaned... like a bowl full of jelly!"

At this point even Nikolai who really didn't seem to give a damn given under situations that he was a bit tipsy started to get pretty sick as the story went along. Takeo seemed a bit taken to the story, he decided to further enhance the image, "Like pregnant hookah!" Tank looked at Takeo a bit surprisingly, '_Damn, what's with him and hookers?'_ "It was deliciously gaunt, it made me giggle! And I laughed and I laughed! I vet myself a little!"

"It happens!" By now the story was bizarre enough that any random outburst was acceptable.

"His eyes popped from his head! O-oh!" was having trouble holding himself up now, "How I love zhe sexy undead!"

_Except that?_ That was a little stranger than a random outburst. "Really?" the American clenched the bridge of his nose as he tried his hardest not to slap the doctor for being so… Weird. Leaning over the Russian seemed to agree, "He's not well..."

"He spoke not a vord and went strait for my heart as I leveled my twelve- gauge and blew him apart!" Another encore of "Woo's" strained across the men as Richtofen laughed. Apparently all over the tree were several tiny body parts spread across so 'beautifully' decorating the festive plant. "And zhen! In an instant! He sprang back to life as I threw back the gun and reached for my knife!" The story escalated as then Richtofen and Zombie Clause began to battle it out. Before long the fat bastard managed to start escaping up in the chimney, on the way up he left the German a present. The finger. Absurd! Nikolai felt the need to shout 'Come back Zombie Clause!' but of course he cannot. As Zombie Clause left he chanted about and left one word of advice. Flying away, Richtofen remembered the words well, "Merry Christmas to all! And to all... a good bite!"

Another chorus of laughter rang out as the seamlessly peacefully night and the strange story came to an end. Catching the punchline a bit too late Nikolai always seems to let us know, "To all a good bite! ahah! Get it?" The men gave the drunk deap-panned looks as he found himself cursing again, "Ah fuck you!"

_And to that, although not Christmas, no Zombie Clause in sight, the men slept contently to await the next of the moans of the undead to call for them to lay another can of whoop- ass for whenever the zombies seemed to want to play again  
><em>

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><p><strong>Alright guys well, thank you very much and if you'd like to see the mother of this One-shot go ahead and look up A Very Zombie Christmas, The Night Before Christmas on Youtube. I would have added more but it's late and my mom is going to kick my ass in a matter of minutes so... Good night and I'll see y'all next time!<strong>


	2. Lets Play A Game part 1

_**Might As Well Call This Hell **  
><em>**Part 1**  
><strong>AN: Hello everyone (:, I'm very excited to see that I received 10 reviews with just my first chapter, even though I did pester my friends to review after they read.. But that is completely irrelevant. Anyways thank you, again to all those who reviewed. I made sure to send messages to FFN users as gratitude. As far as Annon users I know pretty much everyone, so thanks again. Anyways here's part 1 of 2 of the requested two-shot by tylerssecond2, I hope I've written just what you wanted!**

**Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters or some other things that might be mentioned along these various one-shots in this story, they belong to the developers of Call of Duty: World at War and Call of Duty: Black Ops; Treyarch. I simply own small elements in where the inspiration comes from... at least I hope I do!**

**Enjoy!**

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><p><em>"Die zom-bitches!" Dempsey was unloading a Galil clip into a horde of zombies that began coming up the stairs to the Lander. Behind him the doctor was reloading the MP40 he grabbed off the wall.<em>

"Doc! Hurry it up will ya? Headshots with one clip won't last long!"

Dempsey and Richtofen were watching the stairs in where the most zombies seemed to come from, as where Nikolai and Takeo seemed to be guarding the less active windows to watch their backs.

"Someone make a crawler at zhe window!" the doctor hollered over the torrent of bullets coming from his German gun.

"I wirr get the crawler!" Takeo started to cook a grenade and threw it as a familiar 'BOOM' echoed within the windows encasement.

Nikolai grunted seemingly unpleased with the Japanese man that had beaten him to make a crawler.

"Nikolai make better crawler!" he too cooked a grenade and threw it into his window as the lone zombie within lost it's legs and an arm.

Tank came behind the Russian chuckling lowly, "So much for a better crawler 'ey Nikolai?", he gave the slightly angered drunk a pat on the back, "He won't last long... Might bleed out..."

His thoughts ended as Richtofen squealed and gave a maniacal laugh, "Ohoho! Look at how cute my minion is! It's trying to bite me!".

He gave another laugh as the others looked at the doctor strangely before dismissing it.

"Yeah.. Well anyways, Nikolai's crawlers going to bleed out here in a sec. So me and-", Dempsey came beside Richtofen and gave the Nazi a hard slap on the back almost causing the doctor to fall over and lose his cap," Eddy here will babysit Tak's crawler, in the mean time, you two find a rope so we can tie it up!". The doctor fixed his cap and stomped his feet like a five year old and muttered an insulting comment about the American marine before busing himself with the crawler on the floor.

Takeo shook his head as he headed down the small flight of stairs, "Hurry up Russian! Your honor wavers in the distance the longer you wait!"

Nikolai gave a grunt as he angrily took a swig of vodka, "Nikolai has honor as long as Nikolai drink vodka, stupid Takeo!"

Catching up to the smaller Japanese man, Nikolai began to annoyingly sing a Russian song very horribly, off-pitch. Takeo shook his head ignoring the Russian as they both came to a closet where there were several tools and small necessities, including a rope.

"Oh good, now let me grab rope so I can drink vodka in peace!" Takeo, already holding the rope gave a baffled cry as Nikolai tried to pry it out of his hands.

"Let go Russian! I had rope first!" Neither man let go as they quarried for the object as both seemed unaware that the door to the closet was closing shut.

A loud bang was heard along with a click as the door slammed shut and locked itself. Both Takeo and Nikolai stopped in their tracks and rushed for the door.

"What da fuck! Open door or else I attack like Russian bear that was not allowed a bathroom break!", he slammed his shoulder into the door again and again, nothing.

"You bring dishonor Russian! Ever heard of a rrock?" Takeo pushed Nikolai aside as he fumbled around in the darkness to find the door knob. His hands found it as he brought his fingers around the lock. Just as he was about to turn it, an awful shocking sensation shot up his arm and through his spine. It was most unpleasant as Takeo let go and shook his hand trying to get rid of the numbing feeling. "The door shocked me! What is this?"

Nikolai tried his hands at trying to unlock the door, he took was shocked. "What? Stupid door! Hmph, I thought you were just too weak to open door, small man. Oh, also I don't know what a rrock is, but I know what a lock is!" Takeo rolled his eyes at Nikolai's poor impersonation of his accent.

A small girlish giggle echoed in the small confined room, "Now now you two! I vant to play a game! Vill you play vith me? I mean I vouldn't vant to give zhe monkeys in ze box a reason so hurt you!". Her small laugh started to turn a bit demonic as the two zombie slayers started to soak in the words of the haunting German spirit.

"D-did you just say monkeys... I-in a box? In this room?", Nikolai had a bit of trouble holding in his vodka now.

"Shush! Russian, I found a rright switch. I don't rrike monkeys either!" Just as the Japanese said, he found the switch as the closet was exposed to light.

The fluorescents blinded their eyes for seconds. Soon after Nikolai's eyes widened as he found the box. The small box started to scuttle on the floor closer to the Russian. Oh hell no!

"Okay okay Sam! Me and mustache man shall play your games, but no monkeys!" he took another swig of vodka hoping to forget the tiny German mentioning the damned monkeys underneath the small box in the corner.

"I have name Russian! You have no honor!", the two began eyeing each other trying to muster the deadlier stare. "Well I don't care about your name!"

Another high pitched giggle snapped the two out of their staring. Suddenly a bloodied teddy bear phased through the ceiling above the two. "Mr. Teddy Bear is lonely, von't you two give him a small kiss and a hug to make him happy again?"

Takeo's nose wrinkled in disgust, "I wirr do no such thing! It's coated in zombie blood! Almost as disgusting as Russian!", Nikolai gasped, shocked, and grunted. He would take no tolerance from the Jap today.

"I drink all vodka inRussia! Yet you stay ugly! I hate you Takeo!"

Little Samantha seemed to be all but pleased as the two bickered on their hatred for one another. "Oh Mr and Mrs monkey, vill you please come out and play?", she gave an excited squeal as the box shook about and slammed into a wall, freeing the mammals from their confines.

Still not noticing to anything around them they continued insulting one another. As for the monkeys... Well...

The two monkeys from the boxes began to scream and hiss, angered from their unpleasant welcoming. Their little beady red eyes lay upon the fat Russian and the small Japanese man.

They both leaped forward and latched onto both their heads.

"Ahh! MONKEY! NO!" At that moment, Nikolai began screaming like a girl as he flailed about, he HATED monkeys and this is about the worst thing that had haunted his dreams. The small monkey latched it's small paws around his neck, hanging along for the ride, beating on the soviets head and screeching angrily.

Takeo handled his situation differently.

"No rittle monkey! Stop!" he managed to pry the small thing off himself and held it in front of him. The poor thing was very confused and cocked its head to the side questioningly.

"I have surprise for rittle monkey, but only if rittle monkey leave Takeo alone." Holding the monkey in his right arm he reached into his gun holster and pulled out a banana.

The small chimp screeched happily as it climbed out of the Japanese mans arms to sit on top his shoulder while taking small nibbles at the single banana.

Nikolai on the other hand...

"Give me a zombie to play with me instead!", his cries were silenced as the monkey bit down into a hand that the Russian tried to restrain the monkey with. "Fuck! No monkey! Please! I better not have rabies!"

The now slightly sober soviet was running out of ideas. He smashed himself into a wall trying to smack the monkey off in the process. He ran to the door and slammed himself. Those tiny hands were no longer prying at his neck. "Ha! Stupid monkey! Russian is better than you-,"

Screeching ensued as the monkey attacked Nikolai's face.

He cried again as the element 115'd monkey grabbed his head and reared it back, again and again, into the door.

To Takeo this is, by far, the best show ever.

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><p>Elsewhere...<p>

The American and the German grew bored and walked around seemingly. The crawler followed behind slowly.

A shrill, horror movie, womanly scream made its way to their ears.

"What the fuck?" Dempsey looked around questioningly.

Richtofen gave a gauntly laugh, "Come American! I know vhere, or should I say whom zhese screams come from! Ahaha!" He walked forward excitedly with a little hop in his step eager to reach the source of the noises.

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><p><em>Previously, in the closet. (lol)<em>

"Please little monkey! I give you my vodka!".

Nikolai looked absolutely terrible, and Takeo loved every moment of the immature display.

The closet door opened.

"Oh vhy hello Nikolai!", the doctor opened the closet door and smiled very crazed as the Russian barged through the open door way and onto the floor, face first might I add.

Dempsey was speechless, with his mouth agape at the little monkey beating the shit out of Nikolai but not before coming with an even stranger sight.

Behind Nikolai was a very content Takeo along with a very happy test subject on his head sleeping.

The honorful Japanese man stepped over the pitiful Russian and dismissed a banana peel on top of Nikolai's head.

The once angry monkey prowled away above the Russian steel walls shortly after escaping the closet door.

"Oh here you go doctor, the rope." handing the rope to Edward, Takeo let his usually serious mood fade and burst out laughing. Dempsey and Richtofen looked over surprised to Takeo.

Takeo let out a long and low whistle. The monkey on his head dropped down to the floor and did some of his 'business' before grabbing a handful of its chocolate and as instructed, threw it.

Dempsey and Richtofen tried to suppress their gags as the poo flew and landed on Nikolai's head.

Still laughing Takeo rushed the monkey away before stepping away to their nightly camp.

Walking away Takeo hollered over his shoulder, "I told you! Russian have no honor!".

Not knowing what else to do, the marine and the Nazi shrugged and they left the passed out Nikolai on the floor to precede back to Lander B to tie up the crawler to rest.

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><p><em>Hours later...<em>

Nikolai started to awaken, he shuffled himself up right, "Da.. Very weird dream... My head hurts..." He reached a hand back to nurse his head, instead, coming contact with something smelly and goop-like.

"Oh fuck you Takeo!" He grimaced as his face contorted into pain and disgust, groaning, "I hate monkeys..."

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><p><em>A small glowing light encased the two aliened monkeys as it shined in their tiny red eyes. An <em>_erie__ voice whisper around the area._

"I'm so happy Mr. Monkey and Mrs. Monkey got to play! Oh yes! Very happy! I can't zait to see vhat little surprises ve can conjure for our next two victims!"

To be continued...

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><p><strong>Ohhh my goodness, I have no idea what possessed me to take this request into these turns of events! Holyyy shit! That was really funny to write! Up next chapter is part 2! I hope you enjoy this as much as I did and sorry if it was OOC! R&amp;R please(: If you want anyways. And if you are reviewing PLEASE REQUEST! Bye!<strong>

**Oh and P.S YES, I did indeed bring in poo flinging! And failed cliffhangers! Oh the joys of being so weird... ;)**


	3. Lets Play A Game part 2

**Might As Well Call This Hell ****Part 2  
><strong>  
><strong>Woohoo! Hey guys :)! Thanks for all who reviewed and added me to their alerts! I love you all! I'm sorry if this chapter was a little late :) and lack of recognition to y'all, (I'm lazy -_-). I've been busy brushing up on my zombies, especially Shangri La! Best.. Map... Ever! -drools-, I was really surprised, me and my three friends managed to ALMOST finish the Easter Egg without the assistance of YouTube videos and crap but my three hours of Xbox were up and my mom shut off my Xbox T_T I was host... Bitch!<strong>

**Anywho I hope y'all enjoy this chapter especially since I was up till 4am writing and revising this shit! And PLEASE REQUEST! I can't stress that enough! Like come on... You leave reviews but you don't suggest a one shot -_-, like WTF am I suppose to write if you guys don't pitch in ideas! Anyways part 2 of tylerssecond2's request.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters or some other things that might be mentioned along these various one-shots in this story, they belong to the developers of Call of Duty: World at War and Call of Duty: Black Ops; Treyarch. I simply own small elements in where the inspiration comes from... at least I hope I do!**

**Enjoy!**

* * *

><p>The night seemed strangely hot; the need of the lit oil barrels tonight just didn't seem needed.<p>

Tank Dempsey decided to take a stroll. The take of the undead dimmed down as their days of zombie slaying on the soviet space station wavered with fewer and fewer hordes. They only became apparent every few hours or so. The needs of crawlers were no longer apparent.

Even with the zombie-less atmosphere, Dempsey felt himself get bored. His fingers itched to grab his Galil and pull the trigger. He let an annoyed sigh, 'God dammit why am I so bored?'

Scuffing his black combat boots along the gravel below him, he heard a faint but slightly audible, talking. He stopped in his tracks as his ears caught a demented laugh.

Richtofen.

"Damn Nazi! Fuckin' weirdo..." Dempsey just felt he had to take care of this annoyance. The boredom was getting to him. The idea in his head was plotting dastardly as the grin on his lips began to stretch farther, "Time to pay him a small visit".

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><p>Doctor Richtofen was happily mumbling away to some German written notes.<p>

"Oh Ja... Patient number 71209, so much beautiful BLOOD!" He laughed again as his emerald green eyes shined contently at the documents. His eyes trailed quickly down the array of small cursive hand writing.

"Alright Sour-Kraut, what the fuck are you doing this time!" The closet door opened showing a slightly flustered American marine.

"Oh... It's you Dempshey... I hate you and your ugly voice," The doctor placed down his documents before glaring at the marine. "Vhat do you want, I'm very busy!"

"You make me suspicious! Why are you always talking to yourself! Crazy ass mother fu-," Richtofen silenced Dempsey quickly, "My reasons do not concern you! Shtupid American... Now get out! Your presence taints the air vith your ugliness!"

Dempsey's face reddened as he felt his boiling point, "Fuck you doc! 'sides! What do you know about what's good looking? You're probably a forty-year old virgin!" He laughed as Richtofen's face reddened with embarrassment. "Zhat is not true! Shut up Dempshey!"

Dempsey didn't feel bored anymore; poking at the doctors insecurities were amusing. "Oh right, my bad doc. Forgot, you're gay!"

"Nien! Nien! Silence!" he shuddered at the thought, "I have you know I've had many encounters, one frauline from zhe days working on zhe wunder-weapons vas very intriguing. Ja, Jessika Klein..." he gave an insane laugh.

Dempsey felt himself let his guard down, 'Damn that Richtofen!' "Whatever doc, your still gay,".

The doctor felt as though a blood vessel popped right then and there. "Your annoying voice is aggravating! Leave Dempshey! You displease ze voices!"

Tank gave a grunt. "Fine! You're boring anyways!" He turned to leave before suddenly, the door slammed shut right on his face, making the American lose balance and fall backwards into Richtofen who was laying on the floor.

Both their faces burned red as Richtofen shoved Dempsey off him.

"Ah! Dammit not this shit again! First Takeo and Nikolai, now I'm stuck with you! Fucking perfect!"

"Silence! I don't like you either! Stop complaining you ugly zhing!"

"Shut up you fucking Nazi! I'm not ugly!" The men began to square up to one another as they both growled disapprovingly to one another. A childish laugh echoed in the room as a chilling feeling came between the two testosterone fueled men, a paranormal force pushed the two apart, colliding each of their backs to the wall.

"Ok! This shit's getting freaky!" Dempsey bounced off the wall and looked around furiously. Another small laugh sounded, "Aw ze American is so cute vhen he's mad! Oh, hello Edward, it's so nice to see you!"

The doctor lifted himself up off the wall shortly afterwards as his eyes shot around the area before cursing inwardly, "Verdammt! Samantha! Vhat do you vant?". Her giggles encircled their ears again. "Humph! How rude! For once I am not sending zombies at you! I only speak, and yet you are angry vith me!" She hummed quietly, "I vant to play a game. Cooperate and I shall let you go, Jes?"

"Yeah, okay I got a game for you Sam... Eat shit and die!" Dempsey growled at the empty space.

Samantha Maxis' ghostly face appeared as her red eyes bore holes into Dempsey's baby blues. Her voice grew demonically as her small lips curved into a sadistic smile. "Ah! Ah! Ah! Dempshey must be nice to Sammy! Or else!" Suddenly her face vanished again as her spirit roamed and grabbed a hold of the American solider, slamming his face to the floor. She laughed dementedly before her face re-appeared and stared at the doctor. The two eyed each other warily for moments. He broke the silence, "Don't lay your hands on me you filthy child..,", his voice was laced with disgust, "You bore me, cut to ze point!"

"I vant to play truth or dare!". She vanished again. Her voice rang out again, "Oh, Mr. Dempshey!" Sammy's bitter sweet voice was blank of malice as she sounded innocent again. "Von't you play? Oh and don't say no... You know vhat happens..."

Dempsey got up again and mumbled to himself and grimacing, "Whatever... Bitch..." Samantha growled annoyingly. "I heard zhat! Bad Dempshey!" She gave a pull of his ear as he yelped in surprise before clutching his right ear in agony.

"Now zhen! Truth or Dare, Eddy?". He growled at the nickname. Not wanting to deal with the child he nonchalantly spoke, "Truth..."."Hmm, okay! Dare it is!" the doctor gave a flabbergasted gasp as he eyed the area angry, thinking to himself, 'I still hate children!'

Dempsey sat, legs crisscrossed, and bored. His head held in his hands as he tried to keep focus.

"I dare Eddy to kiss zhe american!" Both men shot up off the floor.

"Fuck that! I am not gay!" Dempsey stomped the floor aggravated, "That's it! I'm out of here!" Tank grasped the door knob and turned the handle frustratingly. Finding his efforts useless he began to bang the door and holler out, "Nikolai! Tak! Anyone! Get me the hell out of here!"

"Zhis is preposterous! Ve've already discussed zhis! Verdammt! Zhe doctor is not gay! Now let us out!" Richtofen punched air. Samantha was angering him.

She hissed angrily, "I said I dared you! Gah! I don't like it vhen my toys disobey!"

* * *

><p>With Nikolai and Takeo...<p>

"Radada! Yahaha! I love vodka! Lalala!" Nikolai Belinski sat on the floor of their usual camp out, leaning against the Landers control panel, singing horrible off tune while tending to a bottle of classic Russian vodka.

"Shut up Russian! Dead corpses have more honorable singing voices then you!". Takeo Masaki rubbed at his temples, starting to get a headache from the Russian's awful form of singing.

"Fuck you Takeo! Shove your honor up your a-". Before his sentence could be finished, both men heard banging.

Takeo and Nikolai stopped their ramblings thinking the zombies were coming. Both prepped themselves with their weapons ready for a fight. What they found surprising was what followed afterwards.

"Nikolai! Tak! Anyone! Get me the hell out of here!"

"Is that Dempsey?" Nikolai shrugged. "Stop talking, more doing!" The Soviet shoved passed the Japanese and headed for the source of the call.

"You stirr very dishonorable Russian!" Takeo began speeding up to the Russian. Calling back behind his shoulder, Nikolai cried out, "Fuck you Takeo!"

* * *

><p><em>Back at the closet (Lol again, Ik I'm stupid :p)<em>

The first reoccurrence with Takeo and Nikolai and now Tank and Edward, this was getting ridiculous and Samantha grew relentless.

"I vill not be ignored! You vere dared now do vith vhat I asked!" Samantha whined like a little kid, she was getting very angry. The two men ignored her as they continued to plead to no one for freedom.

"Please is anyone out zhere? If you free me I promise not to experiment on you!" Richtofen began clawing the door with gloved hands as he groaned with distaste.

"Shit man, I am not staying for this crap." Dempsey began to kick the wall in frustration.

"Vhy von't you play!" she growled, "I vill vin! Get ready to pay dues my toys!" Greedily, Samantha brought Dempsey and Richtofen together and mashed their lips together. Both blue and green eyes widened as both men tried to pull away and turn their heads in opposite directions. Their efforts proved futile as the little girls paranormal force held them together.

With their lips still close together, Richtofen managed to get out a few words, "I hate you! Do you see vhat you caused? Zhis is vhy I despise you!"

Tank grunted, "Not my fault you decided to kill the little girl with her dog! Sick bastard! Now stop talking! I don't want your saliva on me!"

"Vait how do you know about zhat? I don't ever recall-"

"Uh... Y'know mumbling all the time doesn't really help. Now stop talking, stupid Kraut!" Dr. Richtofen complied happily with just a slight nod of his practically, immobile face. They both just stood still, oblivious to know how to handle the situation.

Both the doctor and the marine felt themselves become suddenly worried when the door knob started to turn. Their fate was sealed as both their eyes closed, waiting for the reactions of whatever was coming through the door.

The door opened to a surprising sight. Takeo looked in bewilderment as his face scrunched disapprovingly before holding his face in his hand in shame.

Nikolai gazed with a jaw slacked opened before bursting out laughing and pointing at the duo within the enclosed room, "Haha! I knew you were gay Richtofen, but you Dempsey? This is funnier then death of all my wives, da?" He clutched at his stomach as the torrent of laughter ceased to continue.

Dempsey and Richtofen both felt shameful and emasculated. Their faces flared red.

Thankfully the force of Samantha disappeared and both the German and the American departed, gagging and spitting out any taste that might have lingered from each others mouths.

"Fuck you Sam! First the Teddy bears and now this?" Tank cradled his head as he felt himself go into slight paranoia. "Damn, no doubt this is gunna haunt me for awhile… Shit."

The doctor felt himself go a little green. "Exshuse me vhile I go vomit…"The doctor trudged his way to the stamina-up wobbling and gagging along the way.

Tank looked up to the drunken Russian, "At least I didn't get monkey shit thrown at me, asshat." The soviets face flushed in embarrassment, "Fuck you!". Nikolai stomped rather dramatically back to Lander B.

"Freakin' Drama Queen..." Dempsey felt himself gag once more.

Takeo looked at the American that was leaning against the corridor walls. Disinterested, he shrugged, leaving Dempsey to reclaim himself.

Tank felt himself shiver as he wiped the back of his hand across his lips to rid the taste of the doctor, "Fuckin' yaoi fan-girls..."

* * *

><p><em>With Samantha...<em>

"Hehe! I cannot vait to tell Mr. Monkey!" Samantha Maxis' haunting laugh resonating with strange eeriness into the non-existent audience, a bitter tone leaving off from her childish actions, "If ze zombies don't haunt zhem anymore zhese mindful games shurly vill!"

She fell back with her legs in the air as she laughed. "Ah zhey are so amusing! Perhaps ve shall all play again sometime!"

* * *

><p><strong>Well then... Interesting. God dammit! For some reason I feel as though I wrote this chapter better then part 1 _, Grr! Oh well! I hope y'all enjoyed that, and the teasing with Richtofen and Dempsey. Yeah yeah, sorry I ship them, and btw, with all the gay jokes, I hope no one took any offense to them! I ment them to be harmless, I promise! Anyways, thanks for reading and please, again, if your reviewing please REQUEST! Bye!<strong>


	4. The Final Plan

**Random one-shot I wrote progressivly during school on my free time. I am sorry I've neglected you all, I really am. Please read this and accept my apology?**

**Next update, I will be starting on raelight's request. Hopefully it'll be soon.**

**Oh and please note, there are spoiler alerts in this story, if you haven't played Shangri La or the Moon just please be aware I might ruin some things for you.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters or some other things that might be mentioned along these various one-shots in this story, they belong to the developers of Call of Duty: World at War and Call of Duty: Black Ops; Treyarch. I simply own small elements in where the inspiration comes from... at least I hope I do!**

**Enjoy!**

* * *

><p>The madman doctor wandered off from the rest of the pack. The eclipse has been activated and had strangely long surpassed the set timer yet, its darkening spell still lingered.<p>

The unusual humid climate of the Asian forests made wearing his Nazi top jacket unbearable to wear. He unbuttoned his memorable uniform top and folded in over in his arms to prevent it from falling into the water and getting soaked. His black boots squished in the running cliff water. He was in the cliff groove underneath the civilizations waterfall, the running water currents made his walking slightly unstable along with the bodies of the deceased zombie corpses riddling within the watery depths, hidden.

He placed his tan Nazi top on the island rock in the middle of the cliff side. He then hefted himself on top the rocks, being careful not to accidentally trigger the caution brick. (You know, the one that says 'Do Not Press'?)

The eclipse was lessening slightly and staring up to the moon above was now much less painful and much more clearer to see from his temporary resting spot on top the rocky formations.

The slight breeze from the rushing waters behind him blew air forward and rumpled his graying hair and long over-due, white dress shirt brushed against his skimpy frame and over exposed his ghastly, skinny form hidden beneath his baggy attire.

As if on cue, a slightly dark melody echoed in the temple forest, the sound-waves bouncing against the numerous rocks and caves that loomed in Shangri La.

_I see them staring back at me_  
><em>They know my name<em>  
><em>The faces in the sky are<em>  
><em>looking for something more<em>  
><em>My friends have paper smiles and<em>  
><em>laugh at me in all my trials<em>

The melody that played in the surrounding area was by a familiar voice, it played in almost every other location the crew would venture to. Her ghostly, yet sultry voice burned into Richtofen's eardrums and silenced the mocking voices from his sociopath condition.

_Their eyes are everywhere_  
><em>and see everything<em>  
><em>what do<em>  
><em>They need me<em>  
><em>And I need them<em>  
><em>See me<em>  
><em>And I see them<em>  
><em>Within<em>  
><em>The lines they've been<em>  
><em>burned in my mind<em>  
><em>It all ends so violently I know<em>  
><em>My sweet pareidolia<em>  
><em>It all ends so painfully and slow<em>  
><em>My pareidolia<em>

The words lingered in his head and began to upset him as each verse was sang, to the mad doctor the lyrics resembled the point of view of the wretchedly, evil Samantha Maxis.

A scowl deepened on Edward's face, the infuriating thought of the troublesome little girl made more of the maddening, chaotic voices in his head reverberate back into his mind in increasing volume. The thoughts were not at all pleasant and caused the Nazi scientist to grip his head in pure agony.

"Nien! Nien! NIEN! Shtop it you evil little child! Zhe doctor does not like you!"

He screamed a shrill cry into the night, not at all caring if the others heard him in the distance. They'd probably get the idea that he was just too exuberantly excited about a lone zombie and decided to experiment on it since he was such a 'freak'. At this point, he didn't care of what the others saw of him, just as long as they were still succumbed to the elements side effects and help him finish the last step to his dastardly plot.

His heartbeat increased as well as his shallow breaths. He knelt forward, his head in between his knees and his forearms resting on his bony kneecaps.

The songs hidden message played tricks on his mind and he inwardly cursed in his native language as it dawned on the green eyed Nazi on just how pathetic he might've looked to anyone who was watching.

He raised himself from his once pitiful position and cackled crazily into the eclipsed night sky. A malicious grin tugged at his thin, pale lips and he tiled up his slender chin to gaze his emerald green orbs, eyes glistening and reflecting the currently shaded moon.

On instinct the graying haired doctor reached into his large pants pockets and retrieved a now, much smaller, element 115'd meteorite that had fallen into the hillside by the water slide. The power within the radiating, element 115 rock brought warmth and deceived perception of perfection into his mind that left the mad man into a trance of absolute affinity of an awful brewing plot He held it into a tight grip in his gloved hand. The clenched grip he had on the rock strained his slender, long, and boney fingers.

"I vill have my revenge on you Samantha..."

His usually booming voice let off in a whisper. Although not in fear, the whisper was menacing.

_My friends have hollow eyes_  
><em>They're made of shapes and curvy lines<em>

He then grabbed another object out of his backside pocket; the golden rod glistened brightly against the eclipses eerie glow. It wasn't necessarily radiating as per say the meteor, but with the knowledge the doctor knew himself, he knew this simple rod had so much more to it than its apperance. It was a conductor of massive energy, and with the meteor he'd be unstoppable.

_Their eyes are everywhere_  
><em>and see everything<em>  
><em>what do<em>  
><em>They need me<em>  
><em>And I need them<em>  
><em>See me<em>  
><em>And I see them<em>  
><em>Within<em>  
><em>The lines they've been<em>  
><em>burned in my mind<em>  
><em>It all ends so violently I know<em>  
><em>My sweet pareidolia<em>  
><em>My pareidolia<em>

The wicked grin on the former scientists face broadened to an extent, he wanted to convey the message to _sweet little Samantha,_ 'She shall rue the day she bestowed the torrent of his own creations against him' He thought.

He could care less if the brown-haired, blue dressed _monstrosity_ didn't like it. If Sam sent her entire living dead army upon him, he'd be sure to finish his final preparations to make sure she fell with him. What he has planned all these years will not fall in vain because he failed to 'play the game'.

His pawns, (or in other words, his teammates) were all cleverly obeying his every order, with the exception of the American of course.

Richtofen was lucky that the others were clueless to his true intentions even with the slips he'd managed to let out through crazed inspirational moments. A lapse back into their time in the frozen, isolated excuse for a safe room in 2012 confirmed it otherwise. The others were slowly re-cooperating from the unfortunate side effects of element 115, Nikolai, the drunk Russian, was a perfect example.

How could you even keep track of all the misfortunate deaths of several lives, even with the side effects of alcohol?

That shall always remain a mystery to Edward Richtofen.

He shook his head, cursing to himself from getting off topic.

The voices in his head chanted along with the music, strangely doing more good then harm like they would in normal cases. He swore that if he looked into the ghastly noises in his head long enough that he could hear Samantha laughing at his dismay, perhaps it was his physiological problem playing tricks on him? He wouldn't be surprised if his suspicions were correct.

The song played and Richtofen hadn't noticed that he almost skipped two verses. He thought to the lyrics again as the woman's voice sounded dangerously, fueling the sickening conscious in his mind.

_It all ends so violently I know_  
><em>My sweet pareidolia<em>  
><em>It all ends so painfully and slow<em>  
><em>My pareidolia<em>

_la lalala_  
><em>lalala<em>  
><em>lalala<em>  
><em>lala<em>

"Yes, sweet sweet sorrow for mien frauline Samantha... Zhis sad, sad, tale shall end_",_He stared more intently at the eclipse above him more calculating then previous times, his eyes dimming dangerously, "End so violently, so slowly, and vhen I hear your cries, victory shall be mine. Ending so violently... for you."

He gave one last madly driven laugh into the air, shoulders shaking from his excessive laughing. The sound he left off sending chills down spines towards anyone listening. The song descending into a decrescendo until the air was left soundless and left a luring absence in the surrounding air.

_Samantha, we know you're listening._

* * *

><p><strong>I apologize for all the neglect and TeenAngel, if you're reading this... Read the review I left above yours. I call it URGENT!<strong>

**Also I am sorry if around 500 words into the chapter it didn't make sense. I had to try to remember everything I had in mind for this one-shot over a period of three weeks (school weeks mind you) and piece it together so it isn't as clean as I had hoped. I'll make up for it next update.**

**I hope you all have/had a great weekend and such. Take care and till next time!**


	5. Close Call

**Hello devoted readers! **  
><strong>I am so sorry for the long hiatus on this story. I tried running up my OC story again and I just can't do it, just too many problems with the ideas for it to be able to follow through smoothly with progression, so I trashed it out! I also started doing a one- shot series just like these ones in the Hetalia section, read if you'd like to support.<strong>

**This probably has tons of errors on it, considering I did not revise it because I wanted to post this before the new year. I'll fix it later though. Although, I always have grammar errors even with revisions...**

**Disclaimer goes here.**

**Enjoy!**

* * *

><p>"Hurry American! Zhe zombies are coming und zhe teleporter is ready for zhe next location!" yelled Dr. Richtofen over the rein of bullets from his pack a punch'd MP40.<p>

Behind the marine, there were zombies high- tailing with arms outstretched to devour flesh. Their decaying stench accompanying them in the mobbed horde.

Mumbling a 'No Shit', Dempsey climbed up the set of stairs to lander B. Hardly stepping a foot into the mechanism, the crazed doctor pressed the button to launch off the lander and nearly tipped the American overboard the railings. Richtofen beamed a wolfish grin at Dempsey who was clenching his fists, ready for a fight. The other two guests aboard the lander watched the bickering between the two. Nikolai was laughing boastfully with a bottle of classic vodka in hand, chanting in favor of Tank, where as the silent but deadly Bushido warrior, only gave the slightest indication of annoyance to the two.

Dr. Richtofen noticed that the lander began it's descend into the main starting room and finally stopped taunting Dempsey to give further instruction.

"Ah, here ve are my mindless- I mean wunderbar teammates!" His 'smooth cover' was noticed by Takeo for a short moment before the doctor continued, "I need cover to place in zhe coordinates into zhe MTD, stay close together und follow me."

The gleam in his eyes were read clearly by the other zombie killing veterans as they ran about in the lead of the Nazi scientist, killing zombies and rendering them headless along the way.

* * *

><p>The bloodshed ensued as they reached their destination point and Tank, Nikolai, and Takeo were all battling the onslaught of Samantha's pawns. Richtofen was guarded behind them, leather gloves tapping, clicking, and pulling at switches and buttons to prepare the device for take off.<p>

"Nikolai has no ammo! Why does this always happen to me?" Nikolai tossed his spent FN FAL and fashioned a new weapon from a broken vodka bottle, ready to stab those who came too close.

"Ah shit balls, me too!" cried Tank. He too threw his Lamentation carelessly at a zombie who came barreling at the trio. The undead freakbag fell back from the sudden impact and created a domino effect that caused the other mindless flesh sores to fall back as well. Within that quick reaction time, Dempsey sported a pair of CZ75's that didn't help too much considering the mass amount of undead coming toward them that had no doubt, become stronger. So, in doubt, the marine began a trigger happy spree all while silently hoping that Richtofen would be done soon.

Takeo was the only one with a decent weapon. With every pull of the trigger, the Ray Gun began spewing out green orbs of light, instantly killing many of the zombies that dug their way through the ground and barriers. Even with the sheer force the toy like gun possessed, it alone was starting to become difficult to fend off the horde.

Richtofen was still working on the MTD, his eyes were concentrated on each passing light that flickered and the voices of his companions behind him being nothing but muttered verses. The machine would not power on correctly and his display continued to show an error message. As to not alarm the others, he continued to backtrack his work and check for the source of the malfunction.

Although he'd hate to admit, he was progressively becoming worried with all the pressure that had fallen upon him in a matter of minutes. His form was ridged and his lips were pulled into a tight line, turning white from the gnawing of his bottom lip. If the others had the time to turn back to him, they too would see the distress the doctor was dealing with.

"Gottverdammt!" harshly hissed Edward. He pounded his bony fists into the metal column. The buttons on the MTD began to smoke, indicating a short fuse within the mechanism. In the situation they were in, he alone would not be able to evaluate furthermore into the machinery to find the problem, but one thing that the doctor swore he would never do was admit defeat, _especially _in the hands of Samantha. "Dempshey! I require your assistance!"

A turn of blonde hair regrettably forced Richtofen to make eye contact with Tank's blue eyes, "I need you to pry zhis panel off zhe teleportation device."

Tossing his CZ's to the slightly sober soviet beside him, the other two soldiers were quick to work together in Tank's absence and continued zombie slaying. He scoffed and knelt down to eye level with the German and then began to pry off the paneling. The screws that were bolted in place were groaning and bending with the force the American put up to assist the doc.

"So, the all mighty Dick-tofen finally needs my help huh? What, your puny arms couldn't pry it off?" Dempsey's attempt at an insult was flimsy as Tank's face got red from the stress on his arm muscles to pry the damn thing off.

"Fick Dich Dempshey, I hate you. No, I simply ask you to do it because you have to." The melancholy look Edward gave to Tank afterwards was enough for him to stop completing his task to give a hard look to the man beside him.

"Oh really now, and who says I have to?" He then folded his arms across his chest and tried to intimidate the madman with a feral look that spoke 'Don't-Say-Anything-Else-Or-Your-Dead'.

The slimy smile never left his face as his words were spoken for him by Nikolai who turned around and shouted, "I said so because a Cossack never dies! Stop bitching like third wife and help Richtofen!" He then belched loudly and shot more rounds of the dual wielded CZ75's into the oncoming walking corpses.

"Yeah.. whatever, fuck." Muttered Tank as he got back to prying off the panel. Richtofen's smile lingered for a bit longer before he looked away and onward to the zombies that seemed to have multiplied from when he last saw them. Regrettably, Richtofen began to pull off the MP40 that was strapped to him and passed it over to the American marine who was just about done with prying the panel off. Dempsey stopped pulling to look to the owner of the gun and gave a perplexed look.

"Don't ask meaningless questions American, surly a simpleton as yourself can do zhe math, ja?" Taking the gun from the other, he pulled it to his side and checked the clip size. "Your assistance is no longer required Dempshey."

Shooing the man away from his work space, Edward pulled down the final bolt from the paneling and ducked his head inside the mechanism to get to work.

* * *

><p>With the other men, they were maintaining focus on the task at hand and working diligently on conserving ammunition with head shots and keeping tight control on who secures each location, more than once, Takeo would be robbed of a kill from the loud Russian beside him. Normally it wouldn't bother the Japanese man too such an extent, but when they were all low on ammo and space control was limited for shooting and controlling the undead, he became furious.<p>

"Nikorai! Enough with spending your ammuntion careressry! I wirr not allow you to continue your attempts in infuriating me!" With Nikolai in shock from the outspoken Japanese man's outburst, Takeo managed to snag his knapsack filled with vodka bottles with a snap of the rope that held it to the other slightly overweight man and then redirected himself to the zombies again. There was a slight want to humiliate the man further by drinking or disposing his drink with him watching, but with all the honor that was Takeo Masaki, he just let a proud smirk set on his face with mustache and all.

The burly Cossack was about to flip his lid before the strangely somber Tank Dempsey rested a hand on his shoulder, "Dude, now's not the time. We got shit to kill."

A loud laugh from the Russian was all the rest needed to hear to know that Nikolai was focused again, even with the cold aura of anger from wanting his vodka back, he masked it behind and left it to his 'precise shooting' to deal with his frustrations.

"I still hate you Takeo."

"Likewise, drunk Russian"

* * *

><p>Even within the dark, Richtofen made out disfigured wires that, no doubt, were broken and sliced due to intentional tampering.<p>

Sighing, he reached for them and tried to piece together all the loose wires and tie them together without the help of heat. "Samantha, vhat has your Mutter always told you about misbehaving, _nonetheless_ I am sure zhat you vill be punished soon enough." The voices manned his thoughts again as a viscous and wolf- like grin stretched his pale lips as he worked diligently on wiring it all together.

Wire by wire, the smoke began to dim and the former scientist could see every little flaw within his MTD and in no time, got it back to working condition and with any indication, gave a crazed laugh and a small victory clap. "See, zhis is vhy you never underestimate zhe doctor!"

The others turned around and hollered for a moment before working their ways backwards into the teleporting cylinder. The doc sure new how to give a scare.

"Ha, not so clever now, are you little girl?" Yelled Nikolai as the flash enveloped them.

Within the cylinder, all of them had faces of relief, their guns slowly diminishing as well as bodies of the deceased disintegrating with coming in contact with the electricity of the MTD. Even with the slightly wicked grin that bestowed the doctor, or the cocky smirk of the marine, or maybe perhaps the faces of indifference coming from the honorful jap and noisy soviet, that was one helluvah close call.

* * *

><p><em>Wunderbar: Wonderful<em>

_Gottverdammt: God damnit_

_Fick Dich: Fuck You_

_Mutter: Mother_

* * *

><p><strong>I shall be working more diligently on these updates now that a lot of the hype from the DECA competitions isn't something I have to worry about until February. Also, I know this chapter was just.. crap and in no way, shape or form, could even be titled anything closely related to a one-shot. Major SMH. My mom, as usual, pushes me off my xbox and computer cause she HATES that I play video games.. too bad so sad!<strong>

**Note to those who requested slash one- shots, sorry. I'm not going to write them up anymore (exception to MidnightWolf0's request). I'm trying to have these one- shots be appealing to all readers, 'specially since I have my friends reading these and I don't want to stuff yaoi into their faces. Sorry about the inconvenience!**

**This chapter wasn't beta'd so if you find any errors, feel free to point it out to me _politely_.**

**Next chapter will be the continuation and finale of "Let's Play a Game!" so be ready to laugh to your hearts content!**

**Till next time!**


	6. Lets Play A Game part 3, The Finale

**Let's Play a Game- Part 3**

**Hello to all you devoted and avid readers! Thanks again for tuning into my Zombie one-shots. Just incase you were confused, yes; I changed the story title and my pen-name.**

**Also, note to an anon user, Richtofen's eyes aren't actually just one color. In many maps, his eye color changes. For example, in Shangri- La, it changes from Brown to a sea- green. Ascension, it differs between dark blue and green. So, I'm sticking with green eyes, simply because I want to. Hope I didn't offend.**

**Anyways, I promise to stay on top of things and try my best to get more updates out. Thanks to all my awesome reviewers and I hope you all enjoy this chapter even though the humor is very limited and this one-shot ended up being more angsty and action packed then I anticipated. Let's just say this is going to be an epic story that simply wrote itself and I must admit, this far exceeds my expectations and I couldn't have been happier with the outcome. **

**Disclaimer goes here.**

**Enjoy!**

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><p>The heat in Shangri-La was ungodly. Clothes stuck to skin like parasites. Sweat that perspired ended up sticky like golden molasses to tree bark. It was absolutely unbearable.<p>

The four zombie slayers were sad to say that they had actually preferred it when the zombies had given chase, because then they ran for their lives and the breeze that welcomed them was absolutely divine. Now, the humidity became poison. No shaded areas other than the underground mining caves were available, and even then, the outside was much better to cool off; the neglected caves were like furnaces.

Tank Dempsey dragged on as he ventured in and between all the vines and uphill terrain the ancient temple had to offer. His marine jacket hung loosely off his shoulder. If he had the chance, he would definitely go back to the cold freezer that was Siberia. He'd even change it for the zombie over-ran Soviet Space Station they were battling at not too long ago.

_Fucking Richtofen and his stupid teleport locations_, Tank thought angrily.

As he crossed over the large bridge looking over the valley, he was welcomed with the slight breeze of the cascading waterfall before the huge cliff. Even from a distance, he could feel a few splashes of water and the  
>refreshing mist that bounced off from the crashing waters. He visibly relaxed a few moments, basked in the relief of the heat until his blue eyes found Richtofen lazing around on top of the middle rock formation. Like hell does he relax! He thought, before his mind brewed up something very devious. Before he could set it up though, he was in need of a drunken Russian and a few empty bottles of Vodka. Cackling crazily, Tank ventured off in the direction he came to find Nikolai.<p>

* * *

><p>Samantha Maxis looked onward at Richtofen and his pawns, her legs kicked on her invisible pedestal and her lips pulled into a bloodied smile. Her dark eyes also seemed to share in the same amusement as she saw the American walk off with entertaining thoughts.<p>

She began to remember all the previous encounters she's had with the four below, from the time she trapped the Russian and Japanese man in the closet with the monkeys was hilarious, but not quite as satisfying. She remembered clearly that the Jap had outsmarted one of her minions and he had left unscathed. It left her boiling in fury, and in her blinded anger, she released an even stronger wave of zombies to deal with them. It just didn't  
>cut her underling boredom though.<p>

Which lead her to her next encounter with the American and the dreadful Nazi doctor. That was, by far, the most fun yet as she remembered how she had poked fun at Edward's questionable sexual preferences and drove both men completely insane(Well, except for Ricthofen. He's already insane). She laughed and her laughter went on for a good half hour as both men crashed through the rooms restraints, gagging and spitting.

Although, now they were just memories that she would remember in her everlasting life and the boredom she would have to deal with after these four were dead would become dreadful. Something clicked in young, Samantha Maxis' mind and she decided she would give this little game a final go to end it with a powerful bang.

Letting out gleeful giggle, Samantha's ethereal spirit faded and trailed into the depths of the underground caves to prepare her game with a grand finale.

* * *

><p>"Just a little more vodka, Nikolai and you'll end up filling this bottle with golden liquid." Tank exclaimed, with a crooked grin on his face.<p>

Tank ushered the way past drunk, Nikolai, to drink up any vodka he had on him since he had used his empty vodka bottles as weapons. Tank's face was etched with deviousness that Dr. Richtofen usually wore when he  
>'discreetly hid' his secrets.<p>

Takeo, looked on at the two with an annoyed expression, not wanting to partake of the crazy shenanigans, but yet, he was curious of what exactly the duos were planning to do with those contaminated vodka bottles. His silence was not awkward, as Dempsey looked to the bushido warrior with a strange gleam in his eyes.

Despite the strange attitude Dempsey had, his mind was running a hundred thoughts a minute at just how awesome this was going to be. If it wasn't for his bad-assery, he'd probably be frolicking around the entire temple with a shit eating grin on his face.

Giving a grotesque burp, Nikolai looked at Dempsey with unfocused eyes and slurred out a comment. "D-da, Niko'ai is r'dy." The Cossack sat up and pulled down his pants as he readied the vodka bottle to collect the  
>dispelled liquid.<p>

"Ah, dude! Not in front of me!" yelled Tank with a horrified expression, and took two steps back. Takeo, who was not far off, looked with disbelief before he got up and walked away.

"Ah, quit complaining you p'ssy…" He slurred, then pulled his pants up with a satisfied sigh, "C'mplanin' more then wives g'ts you nowher'!" He said before burping again and falling backwards on his backside. The contents of the vodka bottle sloshed around and almost fell out as the soviet shook it about.

With disgust and gusto, Tank took the bottle from Nikolai's unsteady hands and gave a short salute to the Russian, in which he drunkenly returned. Laughter took over Dempsey again as he made his way out to the waterfall, a dark stained glass bottle in hand.

* * *

><p>"Oh Richtofen~" sang Tank with his baritone voice, "I got a nice surprise for ya', for getting us outta that last freezer box. I mean, honestly!" Tank said with a sickly sweet tone. By now, the doctor had rose from his rest and looked at the marine with obvious distaste. "Like hell! That shit was a bummer. So anyway, take this."<p>

Observing the already opened vodka bottle in Tank's hand, Richtofen's green eyes darkened as he looked between the bottle and the foolish American, he checked his boundaries and the sense in the atmosphere. It screamed bullshit.

"Oh really, American? Do tell me about how honest you are vith zhis whole situation, ja? I am absolutely dying to hear about it." The doctor mused on, taking joy at how Dempsey's posture changed in the slightest, which gave away to affirm the doctor's suspicions.

"Let's just say it's from all of us. I freakin' hate the cold and personally, I'd like to keep the balls that I have on me." Tank laughed as he gestured to the bottle again, his features cracked ever so slightly in Richtofen's gaze.

Richtofen smiled sickly as he reached out with a leather glove to grab the vodka bottle teasingly. His fingers, one by one, wrapped around the bottle and yanked it out of Dempsey's bare hand. He then slowly began to raise the bottle to his lips. Edward observed how the American began to fidget around and how he bit his lips in an attempt to hide the crude smile.

Halfway to his lips, the Nazi scientist's demeanor changed and he threw the bottle to the ground. On impact, the nastily yellow liquid seeped out and the glass washed away and fell over the cliff.

"God damn, fuck!" roared Dempsey as his plan was ruined.

"Mutter Fricken, Dempshey! Did you honestly think I would fall for your tricks? Dummkoft." Richtofen scoffed and then looked over at the American. Tank was fuming and like the sadistic person that was the doctor, he laughed in delight.

Dempsey advanced forward and pulled on the collar of the doctor's wehrmacht uniform which chocked Richtofen for a quick second. The butcher's good mood instantly washed away and Dempsey's bravado stepped up. "You want to say that again, in a language I actually understand, Kraut?"

Despite the lack in oxygen, Richtofen wheezed, "Or perhaps you should learn a new language, Sie scheiterte Abtreibung." Even though Dempsey had no clue what the crazy man had said, he knew it was another insult and the marine's lips were pulled into a deep frown.

"You better get to writing your will, you crazy fuck, because your ugly face is going to be meeting the barrel of my Colt here in just a sec."

Richtofen was amused at the others poor attempt to get a rise out of him and surprised the other with his own special weaponry.

It was then when Dempsey's breath caught in his throat when he felt a sharp pain nick at his stomach. He looked down to see the doctor's bowie knife sliding across his abdomen, just enough to draw blood and almost instantaneously, his hand withdrew from his gun and he pushed the crazy blood- sucking German away.

Richtofen let out a hiss as the rock formations behind him dug painfully into his back and then let out a curse as he carelessly let go of his knife. He watched angrily as it washed away with the waterfall's tides, over the cliff.

"Gott verdammt! See vhat you did Dempsey?" A puzzled look contorted on Tank's face as he strangely heard the doctor pronounce his name without his Germanic accent. "You shtupid Americans don't know vhen zhey have crossed over no man's land." He then laughed manically as he watched Tank's form visibly wince at the reminder of war. "Zhat you are familiar with, ja?"

"You've messed with the wrong marine, you son'uvah bitch!" Tank growled.

It was then when both individuals simultaneously pulled for their own pistols and aimed at one another, their fingers itched to pull the trigger.

"Vould you like to die first, Dempshey? I'm sure zhe zombies' vould appreciate zhe free meal." Richtofen tipped his head back and let out a tooth grinding chuckle.

It was then when these two were brought away from a violent urge to beat one another to a pulp by Takeo, who silently appeared from another cave entrance, and a drunken Nikolai in hot pursuit.

"Takeo, no matt'r how muc' v'dka I drink, I still h'te yo- 'Ey! 'Hat's goin' on h're?" Tank let his guard down to look over at the intoxicated Russian, which was indeed a sorry mistake. A loud 'pop' sounded in the air and a painful searing sensation passed over his right forearm. Edward had shot his Colt close enough to tear skin from the marine's arm; not intended to kill as that would be much of a disappointment to the crazed voices in his head.

"OW! What the hell!" Tank yelled. The strange feeling of the element 115 perks 'a cola drink started to do its magic and he looked over to see blood clotting at any unusually fast pace to heal his wound. _Well, at least the damn Nazi can do something useful,_ Dempsey thought.

"Now zhat vasn't very smart, was it?" Richtofen tucked his Colt back into its holster and walked up to the flabbergasted, Tank Dempsey, and removed his own pistol from his hand and placed it away as well. The odd nonchalant vibe the doctor gave off made the other 3 apprehensive.

"Ah! Hallo Takeo, Nikolai! Wunderbar day ve are having."

Masaki simply nodded with his usual stoic actions and Nikolai just drank another glorified bottle of Vodka. Dempsey just looked on with confusion written all over his face.

"Do I not get a 'Hallo' either, Eddy?"

* * *

><p>The atmosphere automatically dropped several degrees and dark large clouds unusually drifted over at an abnormal rate.<p>

_Verdammt… Samantha!_ Edward inwardly cursed.

The others raised their weapons in the air, waiting for her apparition to appear. Richtofen thought better of it and simply crossed his arms over his chest. He expected for the damned and demented child to appear cautiously. If it was anything like the last two times, he was sure that he wouldn't let the foolish girl trick him into doing unmentionable things.

Samantha's bright eyes then blinked into existence in front of the Nazi scientist. Her teeth began to form, all bloodied, sharp, and jagged. Then, the rest of her form visibly appeared and she let out an eerie 'boo!'. Richtofen's eye twitched and his mouth was tugged at the sides in an all-mighty frown.

"Very amusing Samantha, but I'm not one to be scared so easily." Malice dripped from his voice, deathly low and just as demented as the floating girl in front of him. He then swiped his hands at her. Samantha shrieked and disappeared.

"Vhy must you be so mean~!" Samantha cried out, her vowels stretched on longer and created a domino effect of high pitched echo's that caused the other three to put away their weapons to cover their ears. Richtofen's scowl only deepened.

"Don't ask foolish questions, you insufferable child. I'd be damned if I let you continue your charades… Zhat damn closet trick back in Russia vill not at all be brought up again by zhe likes of you!" It was then when Dempsey took in a sharp intake of air and repeated a mantra to himself that those events never happened.

"Edward! You silly little scientist you~!" Samantha cooed. "You just brought it up again, just now actually!"

Richtofen face palmed and ignored some of the amused faces of his comrades. "Halt die Klappe, Samantha!" He kicked the water at the other three zombie slayers, which brought them out of their humor and changed their attention back to Samantha Maxis.

"I may hate Richtofen-," Edward interrupted Tank's sentence and responded with 'likewise American!', which earned an eye roll from Takeo. "But I sure as hell wouldn't want that to happen ever again."

"Hai! Dempsey-San has a good point. I wourd not hesitate to kirr the Russian with my Katana if I had to experience that incident again." The Japanese man said in a monotone voice.

"Very funny, puny Takeo!" It became apparent that the Cossack had come out of his drunken state, just enough  
>to make coherent sentences. (Behold the power of 115!) "That piece of crap would break against me, da!" His statement ended with a wet cough that disgusted Takeo. Before the Bushido warrior could rebuke the annoying Russian, Richtofen stepped in and warded off a potentially pointless argument.<p>

"ANYWAYS! Zhat is not the point. Be gone Samantha! Ve do not van't to play any foolish game you might have prepared for us." The others nodded their heads in agreement.

Samantha became enraged and screamed at their insolence. Her scream was loud enough that it continued in chorus between many of the rock formations and shook the ground. Nikolai and Tank, fell on their asses while Edward and Takeo, were able to steady themselves into the ground below them.

"How vould you like to be alone, Edward? Isn't zhat vhy you are psychotic now?" She hissed.

Dempsey intervened, pissed because his trousers were now wet on the backside, making him look like he had an accident.

"Don't you have those undead freakbags to keep you company? Just tie one down, pull down their p- Oof!" Takeo slapped the marine in the gut and sent him a glare.

In a hushed tone, the honorable Japanese scolded Dempsey in the errors of his ways, "Don't speak of such disgusting things in front of the chird! I would have expected that from the Russian…" Takeo scrutinized.

Tank sheepishly scratched the back of his scalp, large fingers running through past military regulation blond hair, "So I'm guessing the little twerp hasn't had the bird and the bee's talk yet?"

"No Dempsey."

"Oh."

"Vhatever, Edward! You can't tell me vhat to do! Vati told me to torment you, and zhat is just vhat I shall do for making my life so miserable! Vhat did I ever do to you? TELL ME!" A gust of wind blew over and knocked Richtofen's hat off his head. All their eyes widened in witness to his Nazi hat blowing off and over the cliff, into whatever depths that lurked below.

"I HATE YOU RICHTOFEN!" Samantha shouted.

No one knew where to proceed from there as Tank, Nikolai, and Takeo began to take hesitant steps backwards. Richtofen slowly let his hands up to rest on his head, feeling his aging hair through his fingers with the unwelcoming cold that bristled through the strands. This means war.

"Scheiß! You schimpfen!" Richtofen began to let out a long string of German curses, the others eyes widened as the list went on and lost for words, Samantha stared with her mouth agape.

"Shut up! Shut up! SHUT UP!" Samantha commanded. Her usually sweetly, high pitched voice turned demonic and made the air change to frigid cold anticipation.

"I hate you! All of you!" She huffed; the others just sent her murderous gazes that failed to change her demeanor. "Let me just express to all of you just how powerful I really am! Please do have a vunderbar time~" She laughed manically. Her laughs wrapped around each individual and made their hearts beat faster to pump more blood. All the noises and anger that fueled the once playful atmosphere settled into regret of having ever pissed off the ghostly little German girl.

* * *

><p>Groans of the undead filled the air and on instinct, the soldiers all withdrew their weapons, prepared to kill the oncoming attack.<p>

Their eyes were lined with the iron sights of their weapons until something strange began to happen.

"Why is my gun feeling lighter?" Questioned Dempsey.

"Wait a second- Our weapons are disappearing! What sort of evir trick is this?" Takeo yelled.

Shocked looks appeared on all their faces as they ended up not being able to feel the weight of cool, heavy metal in their hands and vision wise, they all began to fade, just as Samantha had moments ago.

In their heads, a strangely quiet voice spoke, "_Did you all think that I was going to let this become easy? No, this is no longer your free game. I have assisted you all long enough. Enjoy!_" Samantha's bone chilling laugh resonated before fading out and the call of the undead sounded out again.

"What does she mean? Holy fuck!" Dempsey said.

They all began to weaken, if their ragged appearances had anything to go by. Edward's eyes widened in another realization, "Oh gott, zhe perk 'a cola's effects are fading! Quickly mein minions, ve must get out of here!"

The four quickly ducked into the mining caves just to the left of the waterfalls and already, the zombies began to spawn. Richtofen ducked and weaved around a zombie, with Takeo following close behind in second, where as Tank pulled back his fist and gave a bone cracking punch to the undead zombie, where it fell back with a splash into the murky waters below. Nikolai, followed Dempsey's example and stomped his foot on the zombie's head, crushing in its decayed skull and mashed the remains of its brain into the ground. Its head dislocated from its body, calling it out for the count.

"Nicely done, Nikolai!" Dempsey praised and smiled cockily before following the other two more agile teammates.

"Da, I know! Nikolai does not fail to bring death to those who deserve it!" He gave a boisterous laugh before he spat on the corpse of the zombie. "до свидания fuckin' zombie!"

The four continued in the caves in the same manner, Richtofen and Takeo lead on and shouted on for positions of zombies spawning and Nikolai and Tank continued to bash zombies to death.

All was fine until a strange bang sounded in the caves and pieces of the ceiling began to fall all around them. Takeo side-stepped around a large stalactite that almost ended his life, the realization was enough to get all four of them to double time their efforts and figure out a way to get out of Samantha's wrath.

"Look, Richtofen! Monkey bomb!" Tank hollered as he grabbed the toy.

"NIEN! Don't touch my monkey!" said Samantha. She, for some reason, could not take away the bomb like she had with the weapons and perks.

"Shut up, bitch!" Countered Tank.

Not wasting another moment, Tank began to wind up the bomb until the cymbals clanked together, the music and singing of the monkey brought the attention of the nearby zombies and that's when Dempsey tossed the damned thing into a nearby crowd.

The zombies all wandered around and stood by the monkey, surrounding the bomb in a trance-like state. The four looked on with anticipation as they heard the end of the melody closing to the finale.

"Bye bye!" Yelled the Monkey bomb.

It was then when a horrible fate cascaded on the quad when instead of the bomb erupting into a huge explosion of zombie bits, the zombies were coated with a colorful display of confetti paper with a cutesy trumpet sounding afterwards.

"WHAT THE HELL!" They all said in unison.

"To the water spouts!" Tank advised as he pushed passed the others to the nearest exit.

"Oh, Scheiß… Zhis is going to be splendid!" Richtofen said with pounds of sarcasm on top.

Nikolai followed but with a gut wrenched feeling, "I don't think that I will like this very much…" He too, stepped on the spout, the sound of rushing, pressurized water, rung beneath their feet.

Before Takeo could step in with the others, the three shot up the spout and he could hear the sounds of enjoyment, surprise, and fright from above. He only laughed sadistically, a feature he would only show in private of course, at the ruckus above. Then he too stepped in and gave his own shouts on his journey to the surface.

* * *

><p>As all of them tumbled out from the cave depth's water spout, their clothes dripped heavily and made the earth beneath their boots muddy and wet, which made it difficult for the quad to advance. Their persistency was outstanding to observe from where Samantha watched from above.<p>

Despite her age, Maxis' daughter was quite an intelligent individual. It was moments like these that she took pride in her snooping around in the labs and taking fruitful peeks at her father's and Richtofen's work.

"_Oh Edward~!_" Samantha spoke telepathically. Richtofen's brows furrowed at her voice but regardless, he responded with an annoyed tone.

"_Vhat do you vant, Samantha…_" She merely giggled and shouted loudly in his head, causing him to trip over his own feet and almost impale himself on the spike traps that gave way to the beginning area.

"_VATCH YOUR STEP, EDDY!_"

Richtofen cursed again and played it off as though he hadn't tripped at all. Dempsey wasn't fooled though and he snickered at the madman's misfortune.

"Shut up, Dempshey. I hate you." Richtofen muttered.

Samantha's voice rang out in the air for another time, and this time her usual jovial voice took over, "I hope you all don't mind getting a little bit more VET!" It was then when the dark clouds tore open and a torrent of rain far heavier than expected fell from the sky. "Also~! Watch out for the monkeys!" A strange bolt of lightning flashed in the sky and a fire irrupted on some of the plant life in the jungle.

They all watched in the distance as smoke filled the air and jungle trees and large plants began to drastically fall over. "I already killed the monkeys though, back when we weren't fucked that is. What do you think she meant by the monke-." Tank's sentence was broken off from the shrieks of chimpanzees off in the distance, and despite all the rain, thunder, and lightning, there was an audible rumble in the ground below them.

"I don't think Nikolai is liking this too much…" Nikolai mumbled off while taking a few steps away from the others. He absolutely hated monkeys, especially after finding out about Takeo's strange fascination to the cymbal Monkey bomb.

All the sudden, the jungle foliage broke away and a large silverback gorilla wearing a spacesuit crashed through and pounded mightily on its chest, followed by several small undead monkeys of those that resembled the space chimps back in Ascension.

"NOO! Not you, you incused filthy primate!" Shrieked Richtofen in an oddly girly fashion. Tank would have loved to crack a joke right then and there, but even he was lost for words as they all stared at the hulking beast finish its mighty roar until its beady black eyes gazed at the four. It then growled, exposing ferocious fangs. All the torn flesh and dried up blood on its jagged teeth made way for only one course of action.

"RUN YOU DUMMKOFT'S! RUN!" Richtofen harshly commanded as he began to push the other three passed the eclipse generator(?). All the smaller primates began to lead ahead of the hulking gorilla and their tiny hands groveled at the muddy earth in haste to catch their prey.

"You don't have to tell Nikolai twice!" Said Russian commented as he pushed passed the others and despite the rain, his movements were not deteriorated in the least. The Cossack began to run as if he were competing in a marathon. A few of the smaller 115'd monkeys followed behind him.

"Nien! Nikolai come back!" Nikolai continued to run and hadn't even bothered to stop to Richtofen's call as his vodka bottle knapsack broke off from one monkeys failed attempt to latch on to the large Russian, and fell into the quicksand that was between the main area and wooden bridge.

Adrenaline ran high as the other three ducked and weaved between the other set of spear traps. Such a nuisance, thought Takeo.

The roar of the Cosmic Silverback did not go unnoticed as they managed to pass through the trap. Dempsey's uniform was ripped underneath his left arm as one of the spikes managed to knick him. His blood began to wash in with his clothes and turned a dark maroon color due to the rain. If that wasn't enough, the wound was deep enough that it had the marine winded, but it certainly hadn't dampened his fighting spirit. He looked behind him to see that one of the sharpened spikes managed to skewer a chimp and rip the small thing in half. Its small organs littered the ground and made a nasty squelching sound that the marine could only smile at.

"Ooh-Rah you piece of shit!" His prideful moment was then interrupted when the skinny scientist grabbed his arm, in the crook of his elbow, and rushed him forward.

"Now is not zhe time for lollygagging, American. Zhat abomination is right behin-", his sentence was cut off as a multitude of splinters sprayed at Edward, Takeo, and Tank. The mutant space gorilla smashed the spike traps, along with bashing, and possibly killing, a few of its brother's and started to squeeze his way through the small passageway. It's growling and roaring never stopping in it's bloodlust to kill the zombie slayers.

"Gotcha' doc, just keep on running!" Dempsey shouted in surprise.

They then ran through the maze and followed in the path the walls carved for them, only to be met back at the beginning of the maze.

"This is not good, doctor!" Takeo said.

They all froze in place, momentarily, once they saw that the Silverback managed to get to the other side of the arch. Many of the smaller space monkeys jumped on through and they noticed that a few of Shangri-La's inhabited deceased monkeys decided to join in on the fun too.

"Ah fuckin' shit balls!"

The Silverback then lunged forward and luckily for Richtofen and Takeo, they ducked beneath its huge swinging arm. Unfortunately, Dempsey hadn't had the chance due to previous injuries and the marine was knocked out from the blow, and fell on the ground in a crumpled lump.

"Scheiß! Dempshey, you-!" Richtofen stared astonished at the once boastful marine on the ground who suffered a terrible head wound. _Just my luck, stupid Samantha_, thought Richtofen. The Nazi Scientist then looked over at Takeo, who was sending him a certain look that made Edward inwardly sigh. He just knew he was going to regret this later, but if the damned American was going ever to die, it would be by his hands and not Samantha's.

He hefted the American over his back with remarkable strength that had the Japanese man's eyes wider than he had ever seen them. It was moments like these that Richtofen was happy that he had done some experimentation on himself. The power of Element 115 was remarkable.

"Stop shtaring at me like I am a piece of your sushi, Takeo. Hurry und keep running!" The Japanese man nodded and ran through the quicksand pit with impressive speed, picking up the Russian's vodka sac as he went and he held it in a vice grip around his fist. Richtofen followed behind with some effort and grunted at the uncomfortable weight of the American above him. "Vhat have you been doing vith your diet, Dempshey? So heavy!" He huffed.

The Silverback was behind them, struggling in the sand pits as the menacing beast squished its smaller primate brethren on its way to the other side.

Crossing over the sandpit, the Japanese, the German, and the unconscious American began to make their way over to the wooden bridge. Richtofen noticed that the perk a' cola machine was missing from its usual spot as he passed.

A high pitched scream echoed from the caves from the other side of the bridge, Takeo's head whipped up quickly to see Nikolai running back to the middle of the bridge with multiple monkeys behind him and one perched on his head, pulling back the wraps around the Russian's head. Behind the monkeys, Takeo could also see the deathly pale form of a Shrieker running at Nikolai.

With all the turns of events, Takeo came to a conclusion that this was not going to end well.

"Doctor Richtofen, rook." He said. Richtofen pulled his head up to see the mass of undead coming and then back to the multitude of primates behind him. He then scowled and looked up to the dark skies with pure malice.

"Ja Samantha? You think you have won? Vell, if one thing is certain, beware zhe doctor!" He then cackled madly and looked over to Takeo, "Hold on my honorable friend, zhis shall be risky!" Still cackling with Dempsey over his back, Richtofen ran to the rope posts at the end of the bridge and began to untie the bounds.

Realization hit the Japanese warrior quick and he turned to the panicked and his most hated comrade. With haste, Takeo pried the chimp on Nikolai's head and tossed it over the side of the bridge and was quick to deliver swift blows to all the oncoming primates after helping the drunk.

While dealing with the smaller undead mutants, Takeo turned around to see that the doctor was almost done with untying the first rope and the Silverback had still not passed through the quicksand maze. He looked on with a raised eyebrow as he thought;_ perhaps the little girl is being more generous than we thought_.

"Nikorai!" Shouted Takeo, "Hord on to the ropes!"

Nikolai, who was still too shocked at the overwhelming number of monkeys only complied and held on to the bridge ropes and looked with anticipation and Doctor Richtofen gave one last almighty pull to the rope bridge. All the added weight caused the other end of the rope bridge to give way on the left side and tip over, leaving only the right side of both ends upright.

Richtofen's struggle was imminent as he had a hard time holding onto the passed out American and the bridge. He could feel his fingers chafe through his gloves and his grip lessens on both the bridge and the body he carried. Edward wanted to just let the marine fall to his death to save his own life, but he oddly couldn't find himself doing so and just managed to bare the struggle to stay alive.

They all watched as many mindless undeads fell to their deaths in futile attempts to catch their meals. Their groans of surprise echoed on their descent to whatever hell resided below. Samantha then yelled in rage, her shouts echoing throughout the temple.

"HOW DARE YOU RICHTOFEN! I work so hard, only for you to foil every attempt I throw at you. Just DIE!"

The Silverback Gorilla finally broke free of the sand trap and its large paws banged against the muddy ground, rocks and pebbles flew to and from with each movement it made. The hulking beast was beyond enraged and the zombie slayers on the bridge only watched as its nostrils flared, advancing toward the bridge.

"I guess this is goodbye then, Nikolai will miss the taste of Vodka more than anything." Nikolai sobbed as he held on to the rope, his feet scraped against the boards of the bridge as if trying to find steady ground.

Takeo only rolled his eyes as he stared at the Russian, "Only you wourd find it in your last moments to think about Vodka. Why am I not surprised, Niki?" Despite Takeo's efforts in lightening the mood, his eyes expressed emotions of anguish and regret. He hated having to die in such an awful place, rather than at peace with his royal family back in Japan.

Nikolai grunted as he watched Richtofen shuffle the American in front of him and use his body to keep him upright on the bridge and moved farther away from the bridge as he saw the Silverback swipe at the doctor. "It's a guilty pleasure. What else is there to say or do when it's obvious we are going to die, da?"

Takeo blinked in surprise at the Russian's honest and intelligent response, and with nothing more to say, Takeo only nodded and watched as the apposing rope began to twine and snap with strain.

* * *

><p>The bridge bounced as some monkeys started to mount and crawl along the rope lines. Things were only going to get harder from here on out as some of the primates attempt to pry Richtofen's hands off the ropes.<p>

Richtofen grunted as the disgusting little creatures invaded his personal space and pulled on his fingers. He was still clueless as to why he held the unconscious Tank Dempsey in his arms._ Just why won't I let him drop?_ Richtofen thought.

"Dempshey! Wake up you fool!" Richtofen yelled. His emotions were conflicted and he certainly did not want to die in the fate of Maxis' daughters hands. His hands strained to keep them from falling to their deaths. "Wake up already you shtupid American sack of sh-" It was then when Tank finally became conscious again and he looked up into the butchers green eyes, his vision was foggy but he could already tell that many things were wrong.

"Dempshey!" Richtofen yelled, the torrent of rain cascaded over pale lips, "Hurry und latch onto zhe bridge! I cannot hold on to you much longer!"

Never had Dempsey seen such a distressed look on the usual psychotic and wicked face of the Nazi scientist from all the other close calls the team endured together. His mind flashed to the panic looks of his old squad mates from when things went to shit, and that's when he knew that he had to muster up all his strength to keep whatever hope they had of staying alive.

Tank latched his hand around the rope, hissing when the torn skin on his left side stretched and the clotted wound began to bleed again. He ignored the pain as quickly as it came and grabbed the rope with his other hand and held on for dear life. His breath caught into his throat from all the sudden turns of events and the underlining truth that the doctor, despite his usual sadism, actually tried to save his life.

Richtofen gave a sigh of relief as the America's weight was relieved from his body and with his free hand; he gave a swift uppercut to the chimp that attempted to loosen his fingers from the rope.

He then sent a murderous glare in Tank's direction that had the marine taken back for a moment.

"You need to lose some veight, American." Richtofen said smugly.

"Yeah, whatever you say Dick-tofen." Contorted Tank tiredly, a cocky grin fitted on his face.

"Ja ja, as far as you know zhis never happened." He muttered.

"With pleasure." Tank said as his baritone voice lead off into a chuckle.

The light hearted moment ended though as one of the monkeys finally bit their way through the ropes on Richtofen's side and what was already a bad situation turned to worse as the bridge violently snapped and dropped, sending the four to the opposite end of the bridge.

They all yelled out in surprised and braced themselves for impact.

Smacking against the opposite end, Takeo let out a curse as his fingers smashed between the bridge and the rocks with pain so dramatically painful that he let go of the bridge and began to fall. His arms flailed, desperate to grab some sort of salvation from his imminent death and to his surprise, what ended up saving his life had the Japanese man speechless. Looking above and blinking the rain out of his eyes, Takeo looked up to see Nikolai holding on to his numbing wrist.

"Like hell would I let that stupid bitch women kill us in such a pussy way. Get up, Takeo." Nikolai said gruffly and swung his arm in an upward movement to toss the Jap onto the bridge. With quick reflexes, he hung on with his good hand on the ropes, his injured hand swayed limply by his side.

"Thank you, Nikolai." Takeo said breathlessly.

"Don't show emotion, Takeo, sympathy is only for pansies, da?" Nikolai huffed.

Takeo just laughed unusually and looked on to the dreadful zombie monkeys on the other end of the cliff.

* * *

><p>"Mutter Fricken…" Richtofen cursed. He repositioned himself on the ropes and held on dearly. It was a miracle that all of them still had enough endurance to hold on. Although, he couldn't lie to himself that he was a bit nervous when Takeo had almost fallen to his death and his crumpled and broken hand looked nasty from his point of view.<p>

"_Oh Edward… zhis game has been so much fun! Although, I have grown rather bored of watching you all hang on the bridge… I think I am ready for zhe grand finale_." Samantha giggled in his head, "_Do tell papa hallo for me… hehe! Just kidding! Bad men like you don't go to heaven vith vatti! I zhink zhat Fluffy will enjoy her new chew toy, don't you zhink~? BYE BYE!_"

Edward let out a string of curses out in the open, his neck strained as he yelled as loudly as he could to Samantha's demonic spirit that he knew was nearby. He hated admitting defeat but by this point, there was nothing he could do.

"Damn, damn, DAMN! I vill find someway to come back! Mark my words Samantha! Zhis vill not be zhe end of Doctor Edward Richtofen!"

More lightning crashed and thunder rumbled in the distance and the smoke from the fire rose and darkened the skies to a pitch black. Samantha giggled gleefully, her haunting spirit cooled the area dramatically and the rain poured to the extent that you could not see a few feet in front of you before your eyes were pounded with rain. Over the natural noises and Samantha's ethereal voice, the monkeys were heard hollering in contentment of having done their masters bidding.

"One, Two, Three, Four, thank you for playing my game! Five, Six, Seven, Eight, Please enjoy your grand finale vith a BANG!" Samantha shouted, her voice much louder than ever before. The four looked up with horror when the cascading waterfalls by the bridge suddenly blew up, the cliff side and all natural rocks surrounding it sent gigantic pieces of rock in each direction.

Over all the sounds that surrounded the temple, the end had come when the bridge finally snapped and down they fell in a tumbling mess with limbs entangled between broken bridge boards and the ropes, screaming the entire way down. Rocks and undead corpses waited at the bottom, the perfect tomb for their meddling mess. All while watching, little Samantha Maxis' and all her undead minions watched with glee, the viscous grin on her face never faltering.

"Goodbye!"

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><p>German:<br>Mutter Fricken- Mother Fucker  
>Dummkoft- Idiot<br>Sie scheiterte Abtreibung- You failed abortion (LOL, I'm sorry, I just had to!)  
>Gott verdammt!- God damnit!<br>Hallo- Hello  
>Halt die Klappe- Shut up<br>Vati- Dad/ Father  
>Scheiß- Shit<br>Schimpfen- Bitch  
>Mein- My<br>Japanese:  
>Hai- Yes<br>Russian:  
>до свидания- Goodbye<p>

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><p><strong>I hope you all enjoyed this chapter even though the end was a bit tragic, but it does lead to a great, 'What If' ending to it all, doesn't it? <strong>

**I'll try to update again before the 26th. I have a ****DECA****State**** Competition and I'm going to be at a fancy 5 star hotel called the Broadmoor; I'm so excited! If I don't update though, I am sorry. I don't think you all know how difficult it is to write for Nazi Zombies when you can't even refresh yourself by playing the game…**

**Thanks for reading, please review, and till next time!**


	7. Splitting Image

**Hello there all of you lovely readers. I absolutely loved all the positive things you guys had to say last update as I have been improving substantially in my work since we've first started. Don't you think? This one-shot has been requested by rarelight and has a bit of fluff that you certainly wouldn't expect to see from a NZ fic. Nonetheless, I hope you all enjoy this small tidbit of a story I wrote for you all today featuring a certain badass American marine.**

**Disclaimer goes here.**

**Enjoy!**

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><p><strong>Splitting Image-<strong>

"Oh jugger-girl, you rock my world~!" Tank sang in a delighted tone as he waltzed up to the red perk 'a cola machine. He was due for another cherry flavored beverage as it had been a good hour since its effects had worn off.

Clad in his military uniform, Tank Dempsey was drenched in sweat from the previous onslaught of zombies, hating how his clothing clung to his grimy skin. Luckily, the carbonated drink in his hand would help cool him off from the insufferable heat within the Asian forest.

Uncapping the drink, he downed the bittersweet liquid in three quick chugs, followed by a rather impressive belch. Tank loved how the drink would bubble down his throat and gut, and how it pleasantly took effect. He felt the chemicals within the drink pump through his veins in a matter of seconds, coating him in a second skin. It made him feel stronger.

Almost immediately, he began to feel a rush of energy rush through him and his heartbeat increased in volume the longer he stood still. Tank felt the sudden urge to run about the temple in high spirits, because who said a marine couldn't have fun? Besides, the rush of the waterslide, sloshing in the wide water bin just sounded so tempting.

A sudden shout was heard in the distance, one of which belonged to a drunken soviet.

Oh, just how could Tank forget?

The water spouts.

Now, not only would the American enjoy himself by partaking in activities that reminded him of his younger days (as vague as they were), but he would be able to clean off the sticky feeling of dirt, blood, and sweat off his skin. It was certainly a 'win-win' situation.

Quick to dip himself out of boredom, Dempsey began a mad dash through the quicksand, ignoring the odd look Takeo had sent him from the other side of the maze pit. His boots began to get gunky with sand as he high-knee ran through and had almost managed to trip twice on his small voyage.

Reaching the other end of the annoying pits, he hollered a 'Ooh-Rah!', before making a mad dash for the slide, his wellbeing bursting with giddiness as he did so. Dempsey honestly had no idea why he had this sudden urge to mess around the temple as though it were a waterpark, but if anyone asked, he was suffering brain damage from the heat. Richtofen would buy it.

_Asshole_, Tank thought.

Dempsey dolphin-dived into the slide and relished in the glorious feeling of the water hitting his bare skin and soaking up his uniform as if it were a camel drinking from an oasis in the Sahara Desert as he continued his way down the metal slide.

Before he knew it, he had reached the end of the slide and managed to twist himself around, feet first, before impact. The cold water dripped off his fingertips and loose clothing.

Due to the side effects of the perk 'a cola, he could hear the small pitter patters of the droplets of water as they hit the metal grates below him, the large rush of crashing water behind him being nothing but background noise as he listened intently.

All of the sudden, a flash of memories reverberated in his mind causing the marine to clutch his head in pain at the heavy, pulsing sensation that was his brain.

Tank was used to his memory returning and escaping whenever he drank his favorite perk 'a cola drink, but this certain memory had the American on the ground, by the crates, in a matter of seconds with a blank look etched across his face.

* * *

><p>A small toddler with honey, golden locks danced in his vision, her curls bouncing freely in the imaginary realm that was his mind. A light and free-spirited giggle pounded his eardrums as the memory continued.<p>

Tank closed his eyes, trying to connect himself further with this missing memory and shut out the entire outside world around him.

'_Daddy,_' The girl's small voice cried out. '_Daddy, when will you be back?_'

The girl's large, sky blue eyes stared back at him, taunting him with a splitting image. Her angelic voice had him confused as Tank tried to pinpoint who this was in specifics.

Small, light pink, delicate hands grabbed at his calloused, large, and worked ones. The feeling was surreal and had Tank shocked at how this feeling differentiated from all of the killing and hard, heated metal that he held in his hands day in and day out that was his guns, his best friends in this nightmare that was fighting the undead.

His mind and memories had their own direction as he found himself involuntarily speaking back.

'_I don't know princess, I honestly don't._' A uncharacteristically strange smile made its way on his lips as he continued. '_My sports' gunna have to be strong though, isn't she?_'

The blonde haired toddler mocked a salute, placing her hand over her brow just as she had seen her father do countless of times before.

Tank laughed and reached out to position the small girl's limbs correctly and lightly pushing her spinal cord forward in the correct posture.

'_Hehe, sorry Daddy, I tried!_' She smiled brightly at the marine, strongly supporting the posture her father had placed her in.

'_Just like a real marine, aren't 'cha Emily?_' He reached out and gave an affectionate rub down on the girl's soft hair. The girl who he now knew to be Emily, his daughter, only boo'ed while shoving his hands off her head, laughing and stating that marines don't get mushy.

'_Come here, little private. I've got a new assignment for you to do._' Tank said, his baritone voice rumbling deeply in a playful manner. Emily took a long stride forward and looked at Dempsey, who was kneeling on ground level with his daughter.

'_Alright marine, we've got a classified mission on our hands and it all depends on you to make sure things run smoothly, are you ready to accept this responsibility?_' Tank questioned, his daughter responded with a quick and punctual 'Sir yes sir!' that emitted another rumble of laughter for his chest. Dempsey looked at the toddler with his eyes, mustering enough emotion to get his message across. '_Private, your honor in the field had proven you to be the best bet for this mission, and as such I expect you to do your best to execute appropriately._'

Children had an amazing ability to read emotion, and that fact proved evident as Emily's playful mood had hardened slightly as she ate the words of her father as instructed.

Tank felt odd as the memory continued, despite the pain and confusion, because it had been quite some time since he could ever recall speaking with authority, where as his current speak was rather… brash and inappropriate. Not that he minded much anyways, but he felt something missing as his authority was now miniscule in the hands of the doctor.

The brief pause on the memory played again as Tank was drawn into the past again.

'_While I'm gone, Private Emily Dempsey is to protect her mother with upmost care, and stay strong in Corporal Tank Dempsey's absence. Do I make myself clear, soldier?_'

By now, the girl's eyes were red and brimming with tears before she brushed them away harshly and nodded hastily. '_Yes, sir_.'

Dempsey held his arms wide and consoled his daughter, her form disappeared within the safety of Tank's strong form and small hiccups irrupted from the girl in his arms. Despite the sobbing sounds, the small girl kept her promise as the tears were contained on her eyelids.

With upmost care, Dempsey brushed one of his larger hands into Emily's back and he gave the girl a strong pat on the back, uplifting her back into her cheerful spirit despite the sad truth behind his comfort.

* * *

><p>The memory dissipated and Dempsey found himself gasping for air he hadn't know he was deprived of and the pain in his skull had dissipated into a dull throbbing.<p>

"Oh, shit…" Dempsey said, his voice was hoarse and quiet.

Of all the memory relapses he had experienced, this one had actually impacted him somewhat. To think that his own kid might've been eaten alive by these sick fucks he liked to call zombies, had him thinking twice to the reality of what had all conspired to being him here beforehand. Where Tank Dempsey might have been thinking of this zombie epidemic as a game, or just a race to save his own life, he had ended up finding another reason to keep fighting, his younger daughter, Emily.

It mattered not if the girl was alive or dead, but the truth that Dempsey was able to recall something from the past with some significance, it was enough to spark something within him.

He was snapped out of his daze while a pair of black, leather boots came about in his vision. Tank looked up to see Dr. Richtofen wearing an annoyed expression on his face as he tapped his foot impatiently.

"Vhere have you been, American? I have been calling you for who knows how long. It is simply inexcusable!" The doctor said as he waved his leathered hands about in a frustrated manner. "Now, if you don't mind, zhe undead are starting to awaken and your assistance is required. Now, take zhis and let's MOVE!"

Richtofen handed the marine his Ray Gun and began to stalk away to the water spouts before he turned around and glared at Dempsey, "Leave it to you to leave your weapon lying about all over zhe place, tsk tsk Dempshey, you are very lucky zhat I decided not to swap our weapons out vhen I found it."

Dempsey only laughed before shaking himself from his crouched position on the ground and gave a rough, appreciative pat to the Nazi Doctor that was headed towards the water spout. Richtofen cursed loudly as the marines slap was hard enough to almost send the doctor over. His hat had toppled to the floor though, and Richtofen found himself brushing off the dirt angrily.

"Thanks doc, now excuse me while I find shit to kill. Ooh-Rah!" Tank laughed delightedly, as was his usual mood whenever the undead started to resurface again, and stood on top the waterspout, laughing as the highly pressured water shot him up and out of the mining caves.

"Vait, vhat? Danke? Come back here American! I do not vant to be thanked by zhe liked of you!" Richtofen said before running into the stream of water to join his team to slay the undead yet again.

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><p><strong>I don't really know what to say about what I've just written, as it just looks like shit on a webpage to me, but I hope you all enjoyed it anyways. I just wanted to publish something for you all because I've been updating my Hetalia stories more than trying to publish stuff for you guys. I'm sorry.<strong>

**Till next time!**


	8. Writer's Block Author's Note

**Sorry, this is NOT an update of a new chapter, but I think I need to post this as a new chapter in need of desperate help...**

**Well, lately my life has been hitting a lot of bumps, those of which have caused my usual sunny and happy mood to plummet and turn rather... sour. I've always used my emotions to write out stories and chapters, but with how angry I've been, I am afraid I'll write something horrific (In terms of how sloppily it's written), or just... very dark.**

**My beta-reader has suddenly vanished as well. With her being in college and all, I wasn't entirely surprised, but I need someone else who will be on top of my corrections and whatnot.**

**Overall though, I just really need someone who is capable of helping me create scenarios, or blossom some sort of ideas for my story writing.**

**Hetalia stories- I need a roleplayer(s) and a beta reader that will help me get on track with the odd pairing requests I've received and to re-live the previous 'care-free' feeling to my story "No Strings Attached".**

**Call of Duty stories- I haven't been able to play Xbox or Nazi Zombies for several months now, so I am unable to recall many of the maps and Easter Eggs that are essential to my stories... So I at least ask for a rebound for my one-shot series and someone who knows a chalk load of all the recent NZ maps for my continuous story, "What Time Travel Couldn't Tell".**

**I think another reason for this writers block is that I've been brainstorming too far into the future with other stories and possible ideas, that it's been bugging me and I feel like I have to write them, but I don't want to.. So difficult.**

**Sorry for this random and crappy author's note, but as I said, I am in desperate need of help.**

**Do you think that any of you will be willing to lend a hand? Please contact me soon. :c**

**-P3 LadyChaos**


	9. Why I Hate That Stupid Kraut

**Hello everyone. I know I've been dead for what seems like forever now. I actually have no actual life things that are holding me up from writing anything for you guys other than me being pretty forgetful and lazy about writing. That and I hardly remember jack-shit about the Nazi Zombie game. My memory is a bit rusty in this fic, so by all means, point stuff out, correct me, criticize, or whatever.**

**Tumblr has taken over and made me a lazy asshole.**

**Anyways, with that aside, enjoy another one of my shitty literature attempts.**

**And no, this was NOT edited.**

**This is just a little random prompt on how I think Dempsey's and Richtofen's first encounter went... (And it's probably horrible since I only thought this up in about a minute)**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Nazi Zombies.**

**Enjoy!**

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><p>"Die, gutterslugs!" Dempsey shouted, as another round of bullets from his gun, ripped flesh from the increasingly difficult to kill, horde of zombies. The barrel of the gun flared red with heat as each undead soldier fell to the floor with decapitated heads and limbs. It brought as grizzled smile to the American Marine as he continued slaughtering the undead and shouting obscenities all the same.<p>

Sometimes, it was hard to tell how long he and the others had been doing this- placing their lives on the line to keep the undead at bay while playing the tricks of the puppet master, Samantha Maxis.

Another bullet tore through the neck of another zombie as it gave one last deathly groan before falling to the earth.

Dempsey ground his teeth as he looked to the crazed German on the other end of the room. His hat obscured his eyes, but his large grin and echoing laugh gave indications that the mad-man was enjoying the chase of the undead flesh-eaters.

"'Ey, Richtofen! Less laughing, more killing!" Tank yelled while jogging above the balcony for a better vantage point to assist, Richtofen, who had at least a dozen zombies trailing behind him. One by one, the mindless, decaying corpses began to fall as the American continued to unload his clip.

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><p>The zombie hordes seemed to have ceased in infiltrating their base of operations by this point. Dempsey hoisted his weapon and watched as Dr. Richtofen began to ascend the stairs to his location.<p>

"Vell, you have done a great job at ruining zhe fun, dummkopf," Dr. Richtofen raised the bill of his uniform hat to look into the eyes of his unwanted savior. Dempsey only glared with the same intensity, crossing his arms around his chest.

The doctor only waved off the American's gaze by smiling wickedly and laughing again, "Zhat meddling frau is playing zhis game so… Distastefully! Vhen or vhere is zhis challenge that disgraceful child speaks of? I do not see it anywhere!"

Dempsey uncrossed his arms and looked over the balcony of Kino Der Toten, resting his knee's on the closed mystery box and holding the wicked wooden rails as he did so. He closed his eyes, clenching his teeth as the doctor continued his rant. Dempsey could feel one of the large veins on his head pulse painfully as the German's annoying voice penetrated his ear drums.

Judging by the uncomfortable, rigid form of Dempsey's body, it wouldn't be long before he beat the crap out of the other if he didn't learn to shut his trap long enough to let his mind think.

"Doc! Shut the fuck up for five minutes!"

Silence.

The German doctor was in mid-step, his hand in mid-motion with his previous thoughts as he turned himself to look incredulously to the American.

"Vas?"

Blue eyes met green as Dempsey looked over his shoulder at Richtofen.

Tension rose and the German's once good mood plummeted and his lips grew to fit his infamous scowl. "Is zhis whole adventure not fun enough for you, Yankee-Joe?" Dempsey continued to observe the crazed man as his long legs began to move him forward and around him; the doctor studied him as though he were another one of his experiments- ready to trap, strap to a table, and pry him open. He forced a shudder at the thought of Dr. Richtofen adding one of his own spleens to the collection in his pocket.

"After all, you seemed to be having fun beforehand~" Edward let out another loud laugh, wiping the corner of his eye with a leathered glove for added emphasis. "Tell me, Dempshey, do you not like zhe fact that at any moment-"

The tall German crept closer, crouching near Dempsey. The American's adam's apple bobbed uncomfortably against his throat. He felt the doctor's warm breath against the shell of his ear.

Dempsey only grinder his teeth harder and clutched the wooden rails with force that caused some of the wood to complain under his grip.

"At any moment, zhe undead could simply reach out-" Dempsey tensed again. The warm sensations ghosted across his back, towards his shoulder blades- "And strangle zhat neck of yours like a toothpick!"

The German growled and then forcefully gripped the neck of the American.

It was at that moment, all hell broke loose between them.

Dempsey backed off the railings and the mystery box, his hands instantly grasping for his neck. Dr. Richtofen's insane laugh ringing in his ears. With a gasp, Dempsey pushed himself back and forcefully placed Richtofen against the wall. The doctor's shoulder blades crushed painfully against the hard walls of the abandoned German theater.

"Over my fucking body!" Dempsey's neck strained with those last syllables and he sent a bone-crushing elbow to the offenders stomach. The two ex-soldiers were, again, at even fighting odds. Each of them out of breath.

Richtofen gave another disheartening chuckle, wiping a leather-gloved hand across his lip. The blood smeared across his pale lips and hollow cheekbones. And his teeth, his once bright teeth, were stained a discolored red. A truly bloodied smile for an insane Nazi doctor. "You American's can actually fight! I am surprised. I zhought zhat you vere just another silly, empty-headed soldier!"

Dempsey was still riled up and continued to hold his arms up in a traditional boxer stance- both fists in front of his face with his shoulders squared in, ready to defend any attacks.

* * *

><p>Richtofen's eyes glinted humorously at the marine before laughing loudly one last time. "Put your hands down, you shtupid American," Still appearing like a crazed mad-man, he smiled with the blood long ago, licked away from his lips and teeth. "I do not like you, American, but zhis vill be a long journey. You, zhe drunk Russian, and zhat crafty Japanese vill all have to play nice if we vant to stay alive. Ve must get rid of Samantha… And if all goes vell, zhen maybe I vill grant you and zhe two other stooges a way back home, but only vhen my vork is done here."<p>

"Auf weidersehen, Demphsey."

With one tug of the lapels on his uniform and a correctional placement of his hat, the doctor strode past Dempsey, whistling his merry tune past the stairs, under the balcony, and to the alleyways.

"Fuckin' insane Kraut. I don't like you either, but I don't want to have to stick around with your crazy ass longer than I have to." Tank muttered under his breath before sulking off to the Jugger-Nog, Perk-a-Cola machine. With any luck, the Jugger girl he imagined the night before would console his mind with fantasies yet again.

_Anything to get away from that fucking insane doctor._

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><p><strong>Yay! Y'all don't have to suffer anymore! <strong>_  
><em>

**Maybe I can revive this fic if I get my Xbox back. Let's cross our fingers that I'll be getting it back on my birthday (July 10th).**

**Till next time and I'll try my best not to be a lazy jackwagon and write more. **


	10. Spirit Lingo

**Hey guys! It's been awhile, I know. Thank you all for your continued support for these strings of one-shots. Kind of crazy that it's been more of a year since I've started writing, and how with these one-shots, you can actually see the progression in my work. From mindless, almost comical troll-like fics to these much more solid stories. I can't tell you how proud I am to be able to write for you guys, honestly. I just hope that regardless of what the genre is for each of these one-shots, that you guys will still like them. **

**For the guest reader who wondered about my Xbox gamertag: I don't have Black Ops 2, yet, but I do have the original Black Ops and a few other games. I wouldn't mind playing with any of you, so please feel free to add me. My gamertag is P3 LadyChaos. **

**Without further ado, I present a quick drabble I wrote on my Tumblr blog. I hope you guys like it!**

**Disclaimer goes here.**

**Enjoy!**

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><p>"Cool it, Stupid-ger! We have more important things than to hear you bitch and moan about the zombies, now GET ON THAT BUS!"<p>

Edward inwardly groaned, desperate to get these newcomers to finish his plans and then fall to their deaths at the hands of his minions. They were infuriatingly annoying compared to the others. He could almost say that he missed his old team.

_Almost._

_"Now now, dummkopf, just listen to me and get to building zhe next contraption!"_ He hissed, and disconnected his connection to Stulanger. Said human below, grabbed at his dirty hair in confusion, entering the bus manned by T.E.D.D. with the others. Misty, pushing at his back to hurry up and slurring more of that rather unattractive speech at the others.

Spirit limbo was odd to the doctor. His anxiety was peaked and his new role of the ringleader of the zombies was turning out to be rather unpleasant.

With the voices in his head, Richtofen always thought that being in control of all of these zombies would be such a joy. The remaining souls on the earth would cower, begging for forgiveness as his all-mighty, undead pawns swiped their clawed hands at their fleshy bodies, sending them to their deaths. Then maybe those damned voices would be pleased with his bidding for once.

Again, his plans did not go accordingly.

While in this strange limbo, the doctor tried time and time again to reconnect with his lost teammates; to torment them more with the undead or aid them, he did not know. No matter how hard he tried to send himself back to the moon with those idiots; his efforts seemed futile, and now he was stuck playing babysitter for these four new zombie-slaying idiots.

He sniffed at the oxygen-less atmosphere and let out another groan.

His new seat at the throne was pitiful, and he was stuck in this deranged girls little, useless body. The tattered remains of Samantha's robin blue dress was tangible, along with her shiny black shoes and hair ribbon that was annoyingly tied to her- his head. Yet, he couldn't untie the damn thing and shred it to pieces. Samantha was left untouched and his true Adonis form was left back on the moon.

He was literally left for Hell on Earth.

"Bleh, bleh bleh, vodka vodka, bleh, bleh, bleh," Muttered Richtofen, "I'm actually starting to miss that Russian drunk"

_Not that they'd miss you anyhow, Edward._

He was so sure that once he gained control of the zombies, the voices would be gone, but they still lingered and were stronger and louder than ever.

_If it weren't for that little girl in your body, the others would have killed you mercilessly by now._

He ground his teeth and pushed the thoughts away, sending another helpful perk down to the others below.

"Ka-Boom!" He laughed wickedly. The others lowered their guns and let out breaths they hadn't known they were holding as the zombies bodies disintegrated in their nearby vicinity.

As long as he stood here in control of the zombies, all he could do was let these other four have a false sense of hope, and crush it once they've done their bidding. Hopefully it would not be long until the other three, along with that wretched girl in his body, could return and he could unleash the full force of his undead minions to do his bidding. All of this at his disposal! It was absolutely grand.

Until then...

"Ach, I am starting to miss the others..." Richtofen said, before his smile became wicked and more of his creations rose from the ground. "NOW, YOU PATHETIC IMBECILES, KILL WHILE YOU CAN!"

_Yes, kill while you can, for your grave lays before you._

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><p><strong>So there's that, guys. Hope that despite the lack of 'funny' in this one-shot, that I can still please a few of you readers out there. Again, thank you for your continued support and I'll see you all next time! Sorry for the lack of word-count on this one too, I've been a little rusty with this fandom lately, just due to the sudden spike of mary-sue fics that kind of ward me away, but I'm planning on jumping back soon enough! <strong>


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